story1102.xml
Title
story1102.xml
Source
born-digital
Media Type
story
Date Entered
2002-08-19
911DA Story: Story
I suspected nothing Tuesday morning, September 11, 2001 as I strolled onto the New York City subway system. I was taking my normal train ride to Canal Street, where I would transfer to the train that would take me to the World Trade Center, just two blocks away from my office. When I got to the stop where I would transfer, I noticed that the train line I was transferring to had been completely stopped. ?Stupid trains? never working half the time,? I muttered, oblivious to the fact that a plane had just hit the One World Trade Center building. So, I took an alternate train to lower Manhattan, getting off the Subway at Wall Street. As soon as I climbed the stairs to street level, I knew something horrible had happened ? something on a scale never before envisioned. I exited the Subway at 9:10 a.m., 3 minutes after the plane flew into the Two World Trade Center building, and ultimately about 45 minutes before that building would come crashing down.
Of course, at that time I had no idea what had happened? I merely stood, struck with terror and dread, at the two huge holes and towering infernos in the icons of lower Manhattan that had been standing there since 1972 ? five years before I was born. After staring in disbelief for a few seconds, I asked someone standing near me what had happened. ?They flew two planes into the Trade Center!? the gentleman replied back, obviously struck with just as much horror and disbelief as me. My first reaction was the same as that of most people, I?d imagine? I thought, ?That?s impossible! Some fire got started accidentally, and has now gotten out of hand, that?s all.? As I looked closer at the buildings, however, and saw the holes where pieces of airplanes had entered and exited the buildings, it became obvious that that was exactly what had happened.
The sick feeling that had been building in the pit of my stomach then getting sicker and deeper. It was obvious that many, many people had already died here this morning, and as I prayed, I felt God telling me somehow that this morning of terror wasn?t over yet. I felt all of a sudden that I had to get inside? into some semblance of a safe place. So I went to my office building, which was two blocks away from the World Trade Center. From my office in the corner of the building on the third floor, I had a perfect view of both towers, and I knew that I could watch the rescue efforts for the fire victims from that office. At this point, I had been silently praying ever since I got off the Subway and saw the horrific scene of fire and death, and from my office, I continued praying and called friends and asked them to do the same. (I also called my mother and father to tell them I was safe? my mother had already left me three phone mail messages while trying to reach me that morning.)
While I was talking and praying on the phone with a friend from Houston, Texas, the most unthinkable, horrific event became reality. From my perch in the third floor corner office of Two Federal Reserve Plaza, I saw the supports beginning to snap and give way at the top of the Two World Trade Center building. I said to my friend, ?Oh my God, that building?s going to fall!? (Not taking the Lord?s name in vain ? it was actually a cry to the Lord, as was all the other times I talked to him that morning, cried to him, and shouted to him.) In horror, I watched the entire Two WTC building come crashing down. In those few seconds it took to fall, I was just beginning to process how many thousands of people I was watching die. I didn?t have time to be horrified, though. As the top of that large building hit the ground, a tremendous dust and debris cloud at least thirty stories high started rushing through lower Manhattan, and directly towards my glass-walled corner office.
I suppose at any other time it would have been rather humorous to see my eyes each grow to about twice the size of a quarter in realization of something. That morning, though, as I saw a massive, ominous cloud filled with millions of tiny pieces of airborne debris rushing at me, the thought settled on me that I might actually be about to die. This 30+-story-tall mountain of moving death that was a debris cloud was screaming directly towards my glass office, and I knew I had to run. So, I dropped the phone in my hands, grabbed my computer bag, and started sprinting for the interior of my office building. After a few steps, I realized how pointless it was to carry my computer bag and dropped that, too, while still sprinting towards the interior of my building. I dove under a desk just before the pitch-black dust cloud hit our building.
Fortunately, no windows on our floor were shattered, and we continued to breathe uncontaminated, dust-free air. In the terrifying minutes that followed, however, it became apparent that others in our vicinity had not been so fortunate. Several people came running onto our floor who had been on the street at the time of the collapse. These people, many of whom you have seen in magazine pictures, no doubt, were covered from head to foot with a thick dust, and most were having trouble breathing from all the dust in their lungs. We helped these people, and devised an emergency plan for our floor in case our environment became contaminated with dust and we had to fashion makeshift masks to filter clean air for us. Later, those plans would prove to be wisely laid out.
After about 10 minutes of staring in horror at the pitch-black dust cloud outside our building, the building?s security PA system fired to life and an officer instructed us to stay in our building for our own safety, due to the thick dust cloud outside. We were only too happy to oblige. I can only assume some sort of bomb threat or other threat was made on our complex shortly thereafter (my company?s Wall Street offices are inside the Federal Reserve complex in New York), because the security officers came over the PA system five minutes later and told us to evacuate the building calmly, but as quickly as possible. I readied my makeshift mask we had fashioned earlier from wet paper towels, and everyone on our floor made our way downstairs to ground level.
When we exited the building, I would not have recognized the street I exited to as the same street I had used to enter the building. Everything ? literally everything ? was covered in a three-inch-thick layer of a sickly, grayish-white dust. There were papers and other small debris also covering the streets; I distinctly remember passing a woman?s single, red high-heel shoe on the street and wondering where its owner was? and if she was still alive. God help her. After a three-block walk, I came across the New York Downtown Hospital, where hospital workers were passing out surgical masks to the fleeing crowds. Such brave people? I accepted a mask, blessed the people for doing a good job, and continued fleeing.
After I had made it about 8 blocks to the North, I heard another horrible, deafening crumbling sound, and turned around just in time to see the second tower crumble in front of me. I was even more terrified than the first time, since I was now outdoors and completely vulnerable to any debris that might be thrown up or kicked around in the dust cloud that rushed out from the collapse. I, along with the people around me, began to run, and I prayed for God to help no one get trampled in what was quickly becoming a panicked mob. Praise God, he answered my prayer, and the people running with me were actually rather quiet and orderly in their running. We ran fast enough to get away from the major dust cloud, only being brushed in the end by a very light cloud of dust that was a remnant of the disaster.
On my 3.5-mile walk the rest of the way back to my hotel, I stopped in several places to stand in horror with my fellow New Yorkers and pray with some people. At times like that, we are reduced to our most base beliefs and elements. Some of the people I talked to were scared: they had nowhere to go, no one to turn to, and even in this, the worst horror anyone in this generation has ever seen (or likely will ever see), they still could not call upon the Lord. Others prayed passionately with me, and called upon the Lord to bring healing on our land? for a passionate revival of people to come to the King of kings and the Lord of lords.
When I finally got back to my hotel room, I was touched beyond words, as I had gotten calls from over 25 different people asking if I was ok, who wanted to know where I was and if I had been injured in any way. What love, what caring!
Of course, in the time since I witnessed this horrible disaster, I have been going through the normal stages of grief and loss. I am still dealing with the feelings and emotions of that day?s events, as we all are.
This type of horror does beg one question, though. Where is God? The Bible tells us God is omnipotent, omniscient, and omni-present? so, therefore, God knew this was going to happen, and he could have stopped it. He didn?t, though. Why? Why, God? Why did 6,000+ people have to die, with tens of thousands more suffering the psychological wound of having personally witnessed the disaster, and millions more grieving and suffering the loss, also? Why inflict this horrible pain upon us? There are no easy answers to these questions, but there are a few truths that God gives us in the Bible to cling to in times like these.
First, God does not cause evil. It is true that he allows evil to enter and rule in the world sometimes, but God is not the cause of evil. James 1:13-15 says, ?When tempted, no one should say, ?God is tempting me.? For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.? Evil is the state of the world? it is the result of Satan dwelling on this earth and causing our ancestors (Adam and Eve) to sin, through which we are born with an inherently sinful nature. Evil happens ? this world is imperfect because of that. Every once in a while, a horribly evil event such as this rears its head to remind us just how terrible evil can be, but that evil is always in existence in our world. God is not the cause of it, but the Bible says that he does allow it to happen.
Second, God does have the power to do away with all the evil in the world, but he chooses not to do so just yet. Because, you see, to do away with all of the evil in the world would require him to sentence all those humans who have rejected him to eternal death ? and God doesn?t want anyone to perish. He wants all of his children to come to him. The Bible does say that, although God does not want to punish any man, his holy and just nature requires him to judge everyone who wishes to be in his presence according to his standards? are they holy? Are they pure, spotless, and completely blameless? So, at some point in the future (according to the book of Revelation), God will bring all of humanity to judgment, and will judge the evildoers of the tragedy of September 11. He will punish that evil as he must punish every evil. The only punishment for rejecting God is not jail time or probation? the only punishment is death. Reserving his entire judgment for a future date, though, is problematic to those of us living on Earth. We have a limited view of the future, and cannot see God?s plan for this place. We must have faith in what the Bible teaches us, however. Evil will be punished, and if we?ve not accepted Jesus as our savior and chosen to follow him, we will suffer the same fate as those evil spirits who caused the destruction of the World Trade Center. God?s gift to us is redemption through Jesus? blood, but without gift, the Bible clearly says that we will endure the same fate as all others who are not holy ? death. We?re told in Psalm 14:3 and Romans 3:23, among other places, that no one is holy in God?s eyes? we have all sinned. The only way to be judged holy and righteous on the day of judgment is to accept the gift of sacrifice that God, in the form of his son Jesus, gave to us by dying a perfect death for our sins and then being raised from the dead. God must judge all evil, but he?s given us a way out, a way to have not only eternal peace, but peace and comfort on this earth, as well. All we have to do is ask him for it!
This is not a time to lose our focus on the only one who can bring us peace, the only one who can calm our fears. This is a time to call upon the Lord ? to say to him, ?God, this terrible act has happened, and I don?t know why you?ve allowed it, but I trust you and I put my complete faith in you as our all-knowing, all-powerful God. Your word says that where sin and evil abound, grace abounds all the more, so Lord, in this time where evil has abounded, let your grace abound in me. Fill me with your spirit, draw me closer to you, and help me to know the peace and comfort that only you can bring.? If we ask the Lord to give us his peace, he will answer us, and we will be drawn closer to him in a beautiful and awesome way. That?s my prayer for our nation ? that God will use this horrible tragedy to bring us close to him as a nation, that many will seek his face, and will be brought closer to his son Jesus.
Jesus brings grace, peace, comfort, love, and life. That is what I wish and pray for you. May the grace, peace, and love of the Lord Jesus Christ be with you, and may he comfort you and restore your life as you seek him.
In God?s Hands,
Jason C. Hortman
Of course, at that time I had no idea what had happened? I merely stood, struck with terror and dread, at the two huge holes and towering infernos in the icons of lower Manhattan that had been standing there since 1972 ? five years before I was born. After staring in disbelief for a few seconds, I asked someone standing near me what had happened. ?They flew two planes into the Trade Center!? the gentleman replied back, obviously struck with just as much horror and disbelief as me. My first reaction was the same as that of most people, I?d imagine? I thought, ?That?s impossible! Some fire got started accidentally, and has now gotten out of hand, that?s all.? As I looked closer at the buildings, however, and saw the holes where pieces of airplanes had entered and exited the buildings, it became obvious that that was exactly what had happened.
The sick feeling that had been building in the pit of my stomach then getting sicker and deeper. It was obvious that many, many people had already died here this morning, and as I prayed, I felt God telling me somehow that this morning of terror wasn?t over yet. I felt all of a sudden that I had to get inside? into some semblance of a safe place. So I went to my office building, which was two blocks away from the World Trade Center. From my office in the corner of the building on the third floor, I had a perfect view of both towers, and I knew that I could watch the rescue efforts for the fire victims from that office. At this point, I had been silently praying ever since I got off the Subway and saw the horrific scene of fire and death, and from my office, I continued praying and called friends and asked them to do the same. (I also called my mother and father to tell them I was safe? my mother had already left me three phone mail messages while trying to reach me that morning.)
While I was talking and praying on the phone with a friend from Houston, Texas, the most unthinkable, horrific event became reality. From my perch in the third floor corner office of Two Federal Reserve Plaza, I saw the supports beginning to snap and give way at the top of the Two World Trade Center building. I said to my friend, ?Oh my God, that building?s going to fall!? (Not taking the Lord?s name in vain ? it was actually a cry to the Lord, as was all the other times I talked to him that morning, cried to him, and shouted to him.) In horror, I watched the entire Two WTC building come crashing down. In those few seconds it took to fall, I was just beginning to process how many thousands of people I was watching die. I didn?t have time to be horrified, though. As the top of that large building hit the ground, a tremendous dust and debris cloud at least thirty stories high started rushing through lower Manhattan, and directly towards my glass-walled corner office.
I suppose at any other time it would have been rather humorous to see my eyes each grow to about twice the size of a quarter in realization of something. That morning, though, as I saw a massive, ominous cloud filled with millions of tiny pieces of airborne debris rushing at me, the thought settled on me that I might actually be about to die. This 30+-story-tall mountain of moving death that was a debris cloud was screaming directly towards my glass office, and I knew I had to run. So, I dropped the phone in my hands, grabbed my computer bag, and started sprinting for the interior of my office building. After a few steps, I realized how pointless it was to carry my computer bag and dropped that, too, while still sprinting towards the interior of my building. I dove under a desk just before the pitch-black dust cloud hit our building.
Fortunately, no windows on our floor were shattered, and we continued to breathe uncontaminated, dust-free air. In the terrifying minutes that followed, however, it became apparent that others in our vicinity had not been so fortunate. Several people came running onto our floor who had been on the street at the time of the collapse. These people, many of whom you have seen in magazine pictures, no doubt, were covered from head to foot with a thick dust, and most were having trouble breathing from all the dust in their lungs. We helped these people, and devised an emergency plan for our floor in case our environment became contaminated with dust and we had to fashion makeshift masks to filter clean air for us. Later, those plans would prove to be wisely laid out.
After about 10 minutes of staring in horror at the pitch-black dust cloud outside our building, the building?s security PA system fired to life and an officer instructed us to stay in our building for our own safety, due to the thick dust cloud outside. We were only too happy to oblige. I can only assume some sort of bomb threat or other threat was made on our complex shortly thereafter (my company?s Wall Street offices are inside the Federal Reserve complex in New York), because the security officers came over the PA system five minutes later and told us to evacuate the building calmly, but as quickly as possible. I readied my makeshift mask we had fashioned earlier from wet paper towels, and everyone on our floor made our way downstairs to ground level.
When we exited the building, I would not have recognized the street I exited to as the same street I had used to enter the building. Everything ? literally everything ? was covered in a three-inch-thick layer of a sickly, grayish-white dust. There were papers and other small debris also covering the streets; I distinctly remember passing a woman?s single, red high-heel shoe on the street and wondering where its owner was? and if she was still alive. God help her. After a three-block walk, I came across the New York Downtown Hospital, where hospital workers were passing out surgical masks to the fleeing crowds. Such brave people? I accepted a mask, blessed the people for doing a good job, and continued fleeing.
After I had made it about 8 blocks to the North, I heard another horrible, deafening crumbling sound, and turned around just in time to see the second tower crumble in front of me. I was even more terrified than the first time, since I was now outdoors and completely vulnerable to any debris that might be thrown up or kicked around in the dust cloud that rushed out from the collapse. I, along with the people around me, began to run, and I prayed for God to help no one get trampled in what was quickly becoming a panicked mob. Praise God, he answered my prayer, and the people running with me were actually rather quiet and orderly in their running. We ran fast enough to get away from the major dust cloud, only being brushed in the end by a very light cloud of dust that was a remnant of the disaster.
On my 3.5-mile walk the rest of the way back to my hotel, I stopped in several places to stand in horror with my fellow New Yorkers and pray with some people. At times like that, we are reduced to our most base beliefs and elements. Some of the people I talked to were scared: they had nowhere to go, no one to turn to, and even in this, the worst horror anyone in this generation has ever seen (or likely will ever see), they still could not call upon the Lord. Others prayed passionately with me, and called upon the Lord to bring healing on our land? for a passionate revival of people to come to the King of kings and the Lord of lords.
When I finally got back to my hotel room, I was touched beyond words, as I had gotten calls from over 25 different people asking if I was ok, who wanted to know where I was and if I had been injured in any way. What love, what caring!
Of course, in the time since I witnessed this horrible disaster, I have been going through the normal stages of grief and loss. I am still dealing with the feelings and emotions of that day?s events, as we all are.
This type of horror does beg one question, though. Where is God? The Bible tells us God is omnipotent, omniscient, and omni-present? so, therefore, God knew this was going to happen, and he could have stopped it. He didn?t, though. Why? Why, God? Why did 6,000+ people have to die, with tens of thousands more suffering the psychological wound of having personally witnessed the disaster, and millions more grieving and suffering the loss, also? Why inflict this horrible pain upon us? There are no easy answers to these questions, but there are a few truths that God gives us in the Bible to cling to in times like these.
First, God does not cause evil. It is true that he allows evil to enter and rule in the world sometimes, but God is not the cause of evil. James 1:13-15 says, ?When tempted, no one should say, ?God is tempting me.? For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.? Evil is the state of the world? it is the result of Satan dwelling on this earth and causing our ancestors (Adam and Eve) to sin, through which we are born with an inherently sinful nature. Evil happens ? this world is imperfect because of that. Every once in a while, a horribly evil event such as this rears its head to remind us just how terrible evil can be, but that evil is always in existence in our world. God is not the cause of it, but the Bible says that he does allow it to happen.
Second, God does have the power to do away with all the evil in the world, but he chooses not to do so just yet. Because, you see, to do away with all of the evil in the world would require him to sentence all those humans who have rejected him to eternal death ? and God doesn?t want anyone to perish. He wants all of his children to come to him. The Bible does say that, although God does not want to punish any man, his holy and just nature requires him to judge everyone who wishes to be in his presence according to his standards? are they holy? Are they pure, spotless, and completely blameless? So, at some point in the future (according to the book of Revelation), God will bring all of humanity to judgment, and will judge the evildoers of the tragedy of September 11. He will punish that evil as he must punish every evil. The only punishment for rejecting God is not jail time or probation? the only punishment is death. Reserving his entire judgment for a future date, though, is problematic to those of us living on Earth. We have a limited view of the future, and cannot see God?s plan for this place. We must have faith in what the Bible teaches us, however. Evil will be punished, and if we?ve not accepted Jesus as our savior and chosen to follow him, we will suffer the same fate as those evil spirits who caused the destruction of the World Trade Center. God?s gift to us is redemption through Jesus? blood, but without gift, the Bible clearly says that we will endure the same fate as all others who are not holy ? death. We?re told in Psalm 14:3 and Romans 3:23, among other places, that no one is holy in God?s eyes? we have all sinned. The only way to be judged holy and righteous on the day of judgment is to accept the gift of sacrifice that God, in the form of his son Jesus, gave to us by dying a perfect death for our sins and then being raised from the dead. God must judge all evil, but he?s given us a way out, a way to have not only eternal peace, but peace and comfort on this earth, as well. All we have to do is ask him for it!
This is not a time to lose our focus on the only one who can bring us peace, the only one who can calm our fears. This is a time to call upon the Lord ? to say to him, ?God, this terrible act has happened, and I don?t know why you?ve allowed it, but I trust you and I put my complete faith in you as our all-knowing, all-powerful God. Your word says that where sin and evil abound, grace abounds all the more, so Lord, in this time where evil has abounded, let your grace abound in me. Fill me with your spirit, draw me closer to you, and help me to know the peace and comfort that only you can bring.? If we ask the Lord to give us his peace, he will answer us, and we will be drawn closer to him in a beautiful and awesome way. That?s my prayer for our nation ? that God will use this horrible tragedy to bring us close to him as a nation, that many will seek his face, and will be brought closer to his son Jesus.
Jesus brings grace, peace, comfort, love, and life. That is what I wish and pray for you. May the grace, peace, and love of the Lord Jesus Christ be with you, and may he comfort you and restore your life as you seek him.
In God?s Hands,
Jason C. Hortman
Collection
Citation
“story1102.xml,” September 11 Digital Archive, accessed December 17, 2025, https://911digitalarchive.org/items/show/5320.