story5836.xml

story5836.xml

born-digital

story

yes

no

2002-09-12

I was sleeping when my husband called me a little after nine on 9-11-01. He told me to turn on the news. I cried as I watched the towers fall and I thought of all of the innocent people whose lives had just been devestated. I didn't know how the rest of the world was being affected, but I felt like mine was coming to an end.

I had just received bad news the day before that my husband and I were unsuccessful at conceiving a child again. Though we hadn't been trying long, when you are hoping for something so much it is hard when reality says no. In the midst of all the destruction and death I felt very empty inside. I was terrified that this attack would mean war and my husband would have to go. My husband was in the active army for three years just before we met. At the time of the attack he still had over two year in the inactive ready reserve. He can be called for active duty in situations like this.

I did things as I normally would that day, but I hardly remember doing anything. I walked around in daze, waiting for my husband to get home from work. I called my parents and cried to my step-father. I remember bathing my dog and cat and spraying the house for any fleas that may have jumped on either of them. I remember riding with my sister-in-law to pick up her paycheck and there was no music on the radio. The DJ was worried about his parents before they live in Manhatten. But they aren't my memories. I feels like a movie that I have watched over and over again, but I still don't know what the ending will be.

Today, one year after the horrible attack, I watch my baby daughter sleeping and I watch my husband sleeping and I thank God that my family is together and healthy. And I ask God to take care of all the babies born without fathers because of senseless violence and jealousy. And I pray for all the people who are still mourning their loves ones. Somehow we must find a way to heal from this tragedy.