story1657.xml

story1657.xml

born-digital

story

yes

no

2002-09-02

I remember the day of September 11th being beautiful. A huge vast blue sky with billowing clouds. I was running a little late for work that day, I left my apartment across the river in Guttenberg, NJ in a rush to catch the NY Waterway shuttle bus down to the ferry to make my way downtown. I had given my company 2 weeks notice the day before on 9/10, so I was looking forward to beginning the next phase of my career. I was looking forward to those 2 weeks; thinking it was bittersweet--starting something very new, but saying goodbye to the people I had worked closely with for the previous 6 years.

I remember walking into my office that day, smile on my face, in good spirits, having absolutely no idea that my world was going to get turned upside down. I chatted with various people in the office, joked around and felt that pang of homesickness that I knew I would inevitably feel when I left the company for a new one.

The view from my desk was the WTC. The office I worked in was pretty much across the street from it. I heard a large explosion and saw balls of fire shooting through the air. I can still hear the glass falling in my mind--it was loud and frightening--and our windows were closed!! You wouldn't have known it though. One good friend of mine started screaming--I'll never forget the way she sounded with the terror in her voice. The flames coming from the windows looked fierce. The manager did not want any of us to leave as he felt at the time the safest place was for us to be inside, not out where the falling glass was.

We got word shortly after the first explosion that it wasn't a bomb like many of us had first suspected, but in fact it was a plane. Naively I thought to myself "well, that could happen...there must have been something terribly wrong with the mechanics or something..." Who would have thought that some insane terrorist would use a plane as such a weapon of mass destruction?

As I walked back to my desk, I looked up at the fire and right before my eyes, I watched the second plane go flying into the building, and huge chunks of it go flying out the other end in massive flames...the sound was unbearable, the sight was even worse. At that moment, I grabbed my belongings and began to run.

Tears streaming down my face--thinking of the people I knew that worked there--thinking my mother was supposed to be in a meeting there--thinking the world was ending--I ran down the stairs with hundreds of other people. 30 flights of stairs to get down to the ground floor. I ran out of the building around to the front and looked up. The unthinkable had happened...People were jumping out of the towers...the sounds were unbelievable. Sirens sounded everywhere, people running everywhere and then stopping to get a better look. I decided then to run. I ran down to where the ferry would dock.

I couldn't believe the amount of people standing around, carrying normal conversations, at some point even laughing amongst themselves...I understand now that people deal with grief in their own way, and that our reactions are not the same. There was a wonderful group of Wall Street Brokers on the ferry dock that were so protective. By this point I was nearly hysterical, hyper-ventilating and terrified of what I had witnessed, more terrified that my mother might be inside. There was so much pushing and shoving--so much pandamonium on the floating ferry dock. The harbor master said no one would board the ferry out until they all got off the dock. I refused to go as did almost everyone there. The panicked pushing continued. The wall streeters formed a circle around me and helped me get on the ferry so that I could get home. I frantically began calling my now fiance and mother to find them.

I remember being on that ferry, coming around the tip of manhattan and seeing the first tower collapse. Everyone on the ferry went flying to one side as they all tried to get a good look. I remember finally getting through to my fiance (we were not engaged at the time) and he told me that the pentagon had gotten hit as well. I screamed on the ferry at this, relayed what I had heard and chills were running through me as if I had just been submerged in buckets of ice water. We were at war.

A wonderful woman--I wish I even had gotten her name--sat with me, held my hand, and gave me her water to drink. She tried to calm me and comfort me. On that 15 minute ferry ride back which seemed like hours, she showed me such kindness that I will never forget her and I wish I could thank her. She hugged me as I got on the ferry bus, said god-bless and I managed to get home.

I remember running across the street to look over the river and saw nothing but a cloud of thick smoke, the smell of which I will never forget. When the second tower fell, I was watching it from across the river. I went to the store, bought two bottles of wine and drank them in an hour and a half. I never got drunk from them, I was merely numb.

Eventually my fiance was able to get home from where he worked in Hoboken. I think we stood in our living room holding each other and sobbing for a good half an hour. Welcome to Hell.

I did end up getting in touch with my mother. Miraculously she had to be in Brooklyn instead of downtown that day. She went down to the brooklyn bridge and drove people to working subway stations and bus stops that day, into the evening. We were very lucky that day.

We lost too many people. The funerals and memorial services were too many and too sad. I had spoken with one of my good friends on September 10th to set up a happy hour because of my new job situation and that I would be leaving the area. Little did I know it was the last time I would speak to him again.

We moved three weeks later--my new job was in Morristown NJ. I have only been downtown 4 times since then, I think it's still a little hard to see it the way it is now. Though everytime I do get down there, I miss NY even more, especially because it was where I was raised and grew up. There is nothing like NY and the amazing city that it is. What I have come to recognize even more is how truly incredible the people of NY really are, and that they really know how to come together.

Since the tragedy, I think we are all quite a bit more appreciative of what we have, who we have in our lives, and of what a great country we live in...I know I am.