story7145.xml

story7145.xml

born-digital

story

yes

no

2002-09-13

The morning of September 11 my husband and I walked around our yard and looked at the progress of our garden before going to work. I was five months pregnant with our daughter Emma Kalisti. Kyle's boss came to pick him up for their annual tradeshow in Denver, so I was taking his car to work. When I got in his car he had a tape in the tape player that I did not care for, so I popped it out of the player and started to scan over the stations. I stopped on one country station and heard them say that the second tower at the World Trade Center had just fallen and a fourth plane in PA had just crashed. I thought it was a spoof, insulted, I changed the radio station. I decieded that I would listen to NPR since they have great news in the morning.

I was listening to NPR's coverage of the events unfolding when a car started honking it's horn. It was my step-daughter with her mom's boyfriend on the way to school. I unrolled my window and looked at him and asked him if he had heard the news this morning. He replied that he had. I then asked him if it was real. He said he thought so, and the traffic light then turned green.

I got into work that morning and my boss ran to get a T.V. to put into our rental leasing office. We spent the whole day sitting statue like watching the coverage as it splayed across every station. I spent the whole day with my arms over my stomach with the subconsious thought that this little protection would protect her from terrorist actions. She spent the whole day kicking my ribs and turning somersaults.

That evening my Kyle and I decided to go out to eat since neither of us were feeling up to cooking. On our way across Fort Collins we noticed large lines at the gas stations. The first gas station we passed we thought it was a bit odd, but by the tenth or eleventh we were sure something was going on. Gas prices were rising as we drove. When we reached the resturaunt people were walking around like zombies. We heard one father trying to explain what had happened to his young daughter. It was heart-wrenching to hear him try to explain that people did not like America, not a specific person, and that she was not in jeopardy.

I did not sleep well that night, or for the next couple of months. I had nightmares about being killed before my daughter was born. I had fears about biological weapons like small pox coming here before she was born and having to make the decision to kill her to save myself. A year later with a healthy 7 1/2 month old I am now only afraid of what our country is doing to others.

The events of September 11 were not provoked by the victims, but our actions as a country have not always been peaceful. I can only hope that the world that my daughter is raised in can be one of peace and understanding. I can only hope that the leaders of cults and countries can learn to understand that the people that they kill are generally civilians, not soliders. My wish is that she will never sit glued to her television or computer with a new life stirring in her belly as she watches thousands of people perish becuase of ignorance and inhumanity. May there be peace.