nmah134.xml

nmah134.xml

born-digital

story

yes

no

2002-08-13

Living on the West Coast of the United States, I woke up well into the events of September 11. In fact, my boss called, waking me up, to ask if I had seen the news yet and if I knew where my best friend Aimee was. I honestly had no idea, and it terrorfied me.

You see, Aimee lived in New Jersey and was working in a limited capacity at the World Trade Center. When we had spoken the night before, she was so excited about her first trip to that bar up on the 101st floor (what is it called? Window to the World?) that previous weekend and how the next time I came out to visit we just HAD to go there. She also told me how the trial she was working on that day had been postponed, but didn't say for how long.

Still on the phone, I turn on the television just in time to see the second tower fall. Newscasters were trying so desperately to keep up with the current happenings that it took me several minutes to piece together what was going on. I sat in abolute shock. I got off the phone with my boss and called Aimee at home as she didn't carry a cell phone. I got the answering machine, and started leaving a calm message that got more and more frantic with every word. Finally her roommate picked up the phone, crying hysterically. Aimee was not in the building that day and was safe in New Jersey. There were so many other people that both of them knew who were still unaccounted for.

I called my parents to check on them. My father works in San Francisco - was he in danger? I called Aimee's mother to tell her that Aimee was safe; she hadn't even seen the news yet.

After staring at the TV for another 45 minutes, I left for work, stopping at a local bakery for breakfast. It was so surreal - nothing was any different than it was the day before. Planes are being hijacked, bulidings are crashing to the ground, people are dying and here I am getting my coffee and scone, normal as you please. Was this real?

I work at a church, and we had a departmental meeting scheduled for that morning. As we gathered, it was clear that no business would be accomplished that day. We shared our stories, accounted for our loved ones across the globe (including one co-worker who was on vacation in England at the time), and prayed.

The phones rang off the hook - friends and family called in all day from all parts of the country to check in. I never realized that working in Los Angeles or San Francisco, at the Department of Justice or around the country giving presentations on software development could be so dangerous. All of a sudden, location was truly everything, which made things very uncertain in regards to my nephew in the Navy - no one knew where his ship was.

The next few days was a fog of images, stories, phone calls, tears, vigils, services, emails, and numbness. All of my family and friends were accounted for, including my nephew who sent us an email that said little more than that he was alive and safe. Our church had a special mass on September 12 and had an improptu prayer service on Friday the 14th. I attended a candlight vigil, watched the "telethon," wore ribbons and pins and displayed an American flag in my office window. I kept busy and informed so that I could say I was doing something and not feel so helpless. All I could do wait for the other shoe to drop, whatever that may be.

My feelings in those first weeks were so conflicted; I was scared and sorrowful, but at the same time felt untouched by what had happened. Here was this terrible, horrific tragedy, and after a week or so, the only signs of anything being "out of the ordinary" was the outpouring of patriotism from every corner. Our skyline wasn't changed, our commutes hadn't been altered, our mourning of the dead was not as intense as the East Coast simply because we were not as directly affected. Sure airport security was completely changed, and every mention of a report from the FBI made me pause, but life was still going on. After a while, the other shoe didn't fall. We waged a "war on terrorism," but like other military conflicts in my life, it all seemed so far away.