story1225.xml

story1225.xml

born-digital

story

yes

no

2002-08-19

My husband, Skip, and I were still in bed sleeping. I woke up with a bolt at 5:45AM and tried to get back to sleep without success. I finally decided to get up at 6:04AM. My husband asked what I was doing up so early - I am a night person and am usually up late and late to rise in the morning so this was very unlike me to be up at this hour. I told Skip that I didn't know why I was up but couldn't get back to sleep. Something was wrong - this had happened to me my whole life...I always got a warning of something going to happen like this. I tried to push it out my mind. I went to the back patio doors to let the dogs out and give them their treats and I was on my way back into the bedroom to get my glasses when my husband, who never turns on the bedroom tv first thing in the morning came hurrying into the family room putting on the tv and telling me to look at what was happening. There were the broadcasts of the World Trade Center buildings being hit by planes. I don't know why but at no time did we ever think this was a movie special effect although so very surreal. I said the same exact thing I said when he turned on the tv many years ago to show me the Challenger blowing up, "OH MY GOD!" I kept repeating this thru the hot tears stinging my eyes, trying to blink them away very rapidly so I didn't miss anything. Skip used to work in the North tower on the 13th floor just before we moved here to Arizona. I'd gone down there to pick him up so many times. MY GOD, if we hadn't moved here...he'd still be there...
We watched and cried in disbelief to see the towers fall. We prayed that everyone was safely out. We prayed for empty floors where and above the planes hit the buildings. I called my parents in Columbia, MD right outside of Washington, DC and my sister in NYC - but our calls could not get to them with the circuits so busy. Our cell phones couldn't get to them either. My brother had just moved to ValDosta, Georgia. He had lived across the street from my parents in MD and worked at Prince George Hospital in DC. The news of the Pentagon being hit had us crazy with worry. What landmark was next, we wondered? Would we be hit here with all our air force bases?
We finally did get thru to my family members and they were alright. My parents couldn't watch the tv after they saw the strikes first hit and I was the one to tell them that the towers were gone now. I remember Mom asking with such insistance, "WHAT DO YOU MEAN...GONE?" I said with a shakey, cracking voice in between my sobbing, "THEY'VE BOTH COLASPED - THERE'S NOTHING LEFT THERE NOW!!!" I heard her tell my Dad what I said and I heard him say, "Dear God, no!"
Somewhere in time, the sadness became anger inside us. "How dare they do this to us!" Whomever they are, they've now woken the sleeping giant and they will be sorry they ever did this to us. We can't let THIS one go by without an answer. I was so mad and so hurt, I wanted to kill them with my bare hands - who did this?
We were glued to the tv for days, maybe weeks. We couldn't think or talk about "IT" without crying. Till this day, we still tear up at the mention, at the site of a picture in the paper, a book, or on tv. We sent money and supplies and wondered how else could we help so far away now.
It somehow hurt us more being native New Yorkers transplanted out here...always true New Yorkers at heart, than the other Americans living here in AZ. After all, even tho we didn't live in NYC now, our hearts were there along with our friends and relatives and ex-coworkers. Skip had worked in 1WTC and it hit him very hard. He used to be at work at 7AM - he used to take the Path in from Jersey from his grandmother's house when he stayed there - now he couldn't allow himself to think about it without breaking down.
It's almost a year now...we have the picture of the 3 firemen raising the flag in a frame on the wall in the diningroom. We wore out our flag being out 24/7 in all kinds of weather - in front of the house...we just bought 2 more to replace it. And we just replaced the flag on the van's antenna...taking off the Jack ball to replace it with a Diamondbacks antenna ball. Flags still line our streets here and people won't sit passively by while some crazy terrorist tries to ruin any part of our "USA". I'm glad for that and I KNOW we won't ever sit still again. With all the heartbreak they caused us - they only succeeded in making us stronger and closer and more proud to live here - to be an AMERICAN than ever before. I can only think: God bless all of us and all the people who cried their tears for us and gave us support all around the world. God Bless OUR America...the land of the free, the home of the brave!