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              <text> MY HUSBAND AND I WERE HEADING FOR BRANSON, WE LEFT CEDAR RAPIDS IOWA EARLY THAT MORNING, WE TO LEAVE ON MONDAY THE 10TH BUT I CHOOSE TO WORK THAT DAY, THE RADIO WAS ON AND WE WERE LISTENING TO THE BOB AND TOM SHOW,I WAS ONLY HALF THERE DUE TO THE FACT I DO NOT REALLY CARE FOR THEIR PROGRAM, SOMEONE HAD SAID THE FIRST TOWER HAD BEEN HIT, AND KNOWING THE SHOW, THE LISTENERS COULD HAVE THOUGHT 'OH WHAT A JOKE' THEN 'CHIP' CAME ON AND SAID "IT HAPPENED AGAIN" IN A TONE THAT IS VERY HARD TO EXPLAIN HE SAID IT AGAIN AND STARTED TO SAY IT REALLY DID HAPPEN, BY THIS TIME OUR DAUGHTER IN IOWA CALLED MY CELL PHONE AND WAS TEARFULL "MOM ARE LISTENING TO THE RADIO?" I TOLD HER I WAS, AND WE TALKED THEN SHE WAS CRYING AND ASKING ME "ILL YOU HAVE TO GO?", I TOLD HER I DIDN'T KNOW, SHE WAS ASKING BECAUSE I HAD RETIRED FROM THE ARMY RES. IN 1992 AS AN E-7{SFC}, I GOT OFF THE PHONE WITH HER AND CALLED MY SON AND TOLD HIM TO CHECK OUR ANWSERING MACHINE AND TO CALL THE CELL PHONE WHILE WE WERE GONE JUST IN CASE I WAS CALLED BACK TO DUTY, WE WENT TO BRANSON, WE HAD TO GET GAS AND GOT SOME IN LEBANON, AFTER SEARCHING FOR A STATION THAT DIDN'T HAVE A LONG LINE, WE DIDN'T KNOW WHY THE LONG LINES. WE BOUGHT ONLY $25.OO OF GAS @2.65 A GAL, WE FOUND OUT WHY WHEN WE GOT TO OUR HOTEL AND TURNED ON THE T.V. WE ENJOYED OURSELVES, BUT WOULD HAVE HAD A BETTER TIME IF THIS HAD NOT HAPPEN, WHEN I GOT BACK TO WORK THAT WAS THE FIRST QUESTION EVERYBODY HAD FOR ME "ARE HAVING TO GO?" EVERYTIME THE PHONE RANG I HAD HOPEED IT WASN'T A CALL BACK, BUT WE ALL DO THAT, IF I WAS CALLED BACK I WOULD HAVE LEFT MY FAMILY AS I DID ON FEB.1,1991 FOR DESERT STORM. I'M PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN AND WILL SERVE HER AGAIN IF NEEDED  SFC PAULA STEENHOEK USAR RET.</text>
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              <text>     Five years ago, I was still in South Korea, and I was third grader. I think I was watching TV at home. Suddenly, on the TV, news flashes interrupted a program that said the World Trade Centers are on fire because two hijacked planes crashed to it. I couldn't believe it how could it be possible. I saw people in the WTC jumping out of the building. Few minutes later, it just fell down. WTC just fell down. At the school, everyone were talking about this happening altough I was not in United States.
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              <text>  All that I can remember is walking to 3rd period choir and hearing about planes crashing into the World Trade Center.  At the time I really knew nothing about the World Trade Center.
  It was such a shock to everyone.  As we sat in awe in choir details, we were being sent out about the attack through the news.  My choir class only got to watch the news for a short length of time because our principal came across the intercome and asked the teachers to turn off the televisions because he didn't want anyone to be alarmed, but at that point it was already too late.  Students were agry, shocked, heartbroken and scared.
  Growing up I had always believed that nothing like this could happen the the United States because we were powerful and we could stop it, now I know better.
  When I came home from school that day my mom was crying.  She had been watching footage of the attack ever since the media had been broadcasting it that morning.  For the past year that's all that I've been hearing about and to tell you the truth I'm still angry and I'm still scared.
  I pray for the families who lost friends and loved ones in the attack against America and hope that some day they will recieve justice for what happened to the ones they lost.  These days I'm thankful for every moment that I have with my friends and family and I try and make all the precious memories that I can.
  I pray for our men and women in uniform who protect our wonderful country.  They are doing a great job and I'm thankful that they're brave enough and care enough about our country to put their lives on the line everyday that they live.  GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!!</text>
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              <text>I was vacuuming, with my head phones on, and I thought "if the phone rings I won't be able to hear it.  I had just got the head phones off when the phone rang.  My son (the one I had finally found after 40 years of separation) asked me if I had the tv on.  I told him no so he told me to turn it on, a plane had just hit the WTC, I thought "how terrible" I wonder if the pilot was on drugs, had a heart attack or what", I was thinking accident..........as the tv came on I could see the other one hit the WTC.  I was shocked, I thought............ARE THEY CRAZY!!!! DO THEY HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT THEY HAVE DONE!!!! I started crying and thanking God that I had found my children before this happened.
  
I have a long and painful (like most of us, I guess) story and to shorten it a bit I will just say. 9/ll/2001 woke me up to what an American is and I wanted to be one again.  

I had not voted........ever.  I wanted to go to Australia and get out of this Country! 

I am was 61 years old when those planes hit the WTC.  It was as though Bin Laden had slapped me, personally. I had heard his name before and somehow I knew he had something to do with it. I went out and bought me a Huge Flag, I put some on my car, I want everyone to know that I am an AMERICAN!!! It is more than an address to me!!!!! 

I want to see the Islamic people of OUR country stand up and say, "I am proud to be an American" I had a son who got involved with these people in Boston in the 80's.  He is mentally ill today but at least he isn't involved with those people.  He so wanted to be a Muslim, but he couldn''t accept the War on Terror that they were teaching him. He had two friends that were of caucasian decent who went to Afghanistan.  I had huge phone bills where he called them in Florida.  He has told me numerous times "they hate us mom, that is one of the first things they teach you, and that is to lie.  When the time comes there are millions of them among us and when 
"Global Gihad" is called they are going to slaughter us like sheep. Well, as I've said, he's mentally ill but I can see a lot of logic in that when just last month a Muslim family bought the neighborhood grocery store.  Parinoid???? maybe, but I sure would feel better if I could see them having Rallies and supporting these Americans instead of hiding behind the towels.  Are they Americans too???? I sure would like to know..........wouldn't you???? </text>
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              <text>     September 11th was a terriable for the whole USA but mostly for the people that live in New York City.The people that did the attact should be found where ever they live at.No matter what it would take to find them because know life in those cities that got hit wont be the same no more.
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              <text>I will never forget that morning.  I am in Sales and was heading to my first call of the day.  I happened to hear on the radio that a plane had flew into the World Trade Center.  At that time, most of the world was under the impression that it was accidental.  When I arrived at my first call, it was then that I learned about the second plane.  I remember going into their conferance room, where most of the employees had gathered to watch the horror unfolding on the tv.  Needless to say, I didn't feel like working anymore.  I can't explain all the emotions that I was feeling.  But I remember feeling fear.  I remember looking to the sky and seeing planes in flight...my thoughts were of wondering if those planes were going to land safety or would there be more terror.  I didn't see anymore tv footage until I got home that afternoon.  Its weird how you say you don't want to see something like that but you are glued to the tv all the same.  I can remember I never cried...I believe I was just in shock.  So many lives were lost that day..but so many heros came out of that day as well.  Our Nation also became one...the unity that I saw helped me go forward with my life.  I thought of all the times I was upset because something didn't go the way I wanted it to.  I now think differantly.  I am more grateful for what I have and cherish every moment of every day. If I could say anything to our future generations about September 11, 2001--be grateful for what you have, be proud of your country, and constantly remember you live in a free country.  All of those people who died on September 11, 2001 were proud Americans..don't ever let their memory die. </text>
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              <text>AN OPEN LETTER TO THE NATIONAL FIRE ACADEMY ALUMNI
  A TRIBUTE TO FALLEN BROTHERS-A NATIONAL TRAGEDY
		By Ron Kanterman-Executive Leadership Team

October 1, 2001

I write to you with a heavy heart. As a former member of the New York Fire Department and a fire service advocate, I like all of you are trying to come to terms with the incredible loss of life in New York, in Pennsylvania and at The Pentagon. What separates the World Trade Center attack from the others is the thousands lost in one location along with 343 fire personnel and 70 police officers. Eyewitness accounts from survivors of the twin towers stated that firefighters passed them going up into the building while they evacuated down the stairwells. Some of the encounters were at the 40th and 50th floors. Forty or 50 floors up? I would suggest that the best of the best that go to the combat challenge every year could barely make it. I?m banking on pure adrenaline. Yes, our brothers along with NYPD and Port Authority PD Officers were going up higher in to the buildings to rescue and evacuate people. Probably something all of us would have done under the same circumstances. We are all sad and in the case of the members of the FDNY are all still in shock. It will take a generation for things to get better in New York. When today?s probies retire 20 or 25 years from now and no one is left working in the FDNY who was on the job on September 11, 2001 things will get better for them.  

Millions of stories have emerged from these tragedies. My cousin works in Tower 2. She was late because she had to walk the dog that morning. And then there?s the police officer who filed his retirement papers a few blocks away at the pension board and then responded to the buildings. He never emerged. People were laid off on Monday from one company in the WTC. Others were hired to start that week or transferred back from over seas. My brother-in-law?s Brooklyn Engine Co. responded on the second 5th alarm after the second plane hit. They got on scene as the first tower fell. They were spared. They headed toward the remaining tower. It started to come down. They were spared again. One of my graduate students from this past summer?s semester, a young Lieutenant with so much promise is on the list of those missing. BC Ray Downey a friend through Fire Engineering and FDIC is missing as well. His retirement party was week before the attack. Yes, there are millions of stories. 

My Rescue Team staged at the Staten Island ferry waiting to go to New York. The City of Elizabeth Rescue went instead. We stayed back to protect Union County. Thirty-five other Union County units along with units form Middlesex and Essex counties (New Jersey) moved over the bridges into firehouses to cover parts of Brooklyn and Staten Island. Mutual Aid Coordinators occupied the Staten Island Communications Offices. Long Island companies came in from the east to cover other parts of Brooklyn and Queens. Westchester County came in from the north. For the first time in history, the FDNY needed mutual aid. 

I was in Fairfax, VA with the IAFC Hazmat Committee for a scheduled two day meeting when this all happened. We ended up at IAFC headquarters, manning phones and helping out where we could. What started out as a committee meeting ended up as a full day of press interviews, worries of those who were back home and concern for the members of our home fire departments. I drove back home to New Jersey with break neck speed through the night. My industrial facility was locked down with local police at the gates toting shot guns, wearing vests and helmets, as was the local refinery. My fire department was on stand-by. For three hours on I-95, nothing flying and no other cars on the road. What the hell really happened over the past 12 hours? My mind was racing faster then the big 8 in my Suburban.  

On Wednesday night, I went to the 8th Division in SI to meet with the Division Deputy to liaison between NJ and NY. A good friend and fellow adjunct college professor at the local community college was the shift Deputy that day. It made things easy. The 8th Division is in the same quarters with Rescue Co. 5. They just got their rig back to quarters. Damaged, dirty, no glass anywhere and 12 men less. That?s half the company. What most people don?t know was that the box came in just before 0900 which is FDNY shift change. The day shift was already in for relief. Once they heard what it was, they got their gear and jumped on the rig along with the night shift. The losses for the special units like Rescues and Squads was doubled throughout the city. One house in midtown left for the alarm with 16 men. Only one returned. This will take a long, long time.

I visited the site two weeks later, at night. It was surreal. It looked like a movie set. High intensity light towers. Trailers, tents, people moving about with ID tags. Food tables, people on cell phones and radios. The US Armed Forces are present. Uniformed soldiers in downtown Manhattan? Can this be? The piles of rubble are 10 or 15 stories high still two weeks in. Cranes moving about. Two firefighters in an elevated tower ladder spraying down the still burning fires and hot steel. I worked in a building known as One Liberty Plaza in the early 70?s. (That?s the building they thought would also fall two or three days after the attack.) Standing on West and Vesey streets, it took me 15 minutes to get my bearings. I?ve been on that intersection thousands of times but without the landmarks, it was difficult to really put things in perspective. We stood and stared, looked, wondered and realized that no one could possibly be alive. My only hope is as this letter went to the web page, I would be proven wrong over time. The TV does no justice to the enormity of it all and yet being there, it still didn?t look real.  

I spoke to my mentor on the phone last week, a recently retired high-ranking staff chief from FDNY. He mentioned that they (The City Officials) have just started discussing the almost 25,000 people who were evacuated and rescued by the FDNY and police prior to the collapses. We?ve all been caught up in the grief and disbelief and not what they accomplished on that fateful day. The remaining members now go to work at night and to wakes and funerals in the daytime. They flip to day shift and go to wakes at night. There will be 343 of them to attend. The cops are suffering too. We?ve always said the armed forces fought the wars abroad and the cops and firefighters fought the wars at home. How profound. 

Well my brothers and sisters, it?s time to catch our breath and go forward. It?s OK to keep grieving and lest we never forget the incredible loss to the New York City Fire Department and the American Fire Service. They?re loss is ours. We share it with them as we do all of our line-of-duty deaths. An 18 year old volunteer firefighter lost his life this week in a training accident. We mourn his death too. There is a family without a son, a department planning a line of duty funeral and an entire community in mourning. The beat goes on. Isn?t it amazing it took an incident like this for the American public to recognize the job we do day in and day out, career, volunteer, military, industrial or otherwise? People are cheering the busloads of firefighters, USAR Team members and police officers going up and down the West Side Highway to and from the staging area. Why haven?t they cheered before? Don?t let the cheering stop. Honor the fallen firefighters with staying vigilant in marketing our mission. Keep reminding the citizens of our country that we?re first on scene for everything every time. People know that the fire department will show up. Pull the box. Someone comes. It?s that simple. The fear is that this all goes away over time, even the current patriotic spirit of our nation. Don?t let it. We can never forget.    

It would appear that the National Fire Academy along with the USFA and FEMA will expand its mission and grow stronger in light of the past weeks events. The President of the IAFC and former Executive Leadership Team member of the NFAAA has already called for reforms and for FEMA to take more of an active role in anti-terrorism and terrorism response training. It could very well end up at ?our house.? Let?s be there for the NFA and do whatever it takes to continue to support and promote our institution and assist the staff with their new roles and responsibilities. It?s ours. We own it. Continue to embrace it. Leave the campus every time with the thought of going back. Keep in touch with your classmates. Keep an eye on our web site (NFAALUMNI.ORG) 

In the mean time, pray for all the lost souls in New York, Virginia and Pennsylvania.

Fraternally yours,

Ron Kanterman                             
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              <text>I was driving to work and was listening to the local sports station .No news-just the scores from last evening.I pulled in the parking spot and turned off my car.When I went in people were watching in dead silence  on our TV the horrible images on CNN that were being shown.No one said a word.The 1st plane had just crashed.When the 2nd one hit ALL employees stopped working and we just watched in amazement the TV
Finally at 11:00AM I left the building and went to see a client downtown.
I listened to the reports on a local radio station.

The streets were quiet-very eerie for a city of 2 million people.


My thoughts go out to all who were affected by this event

Joel Cadesky</text>
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              <text>The greatest thing that man can do is to contribute.   

On that horrible day, my husband, Peewee, now a Hollywood stuntman, learned that fourteen of the ESU men that he trained with, were missing.  Being in California, he felt so helpless, and paced like a caged cat, waiting to be given permission to go to NY to help in the rescue efforts, to contribute.  As a few days passed, he was finally given the okay to come to ground zero.  I knew as I packed his bags, that this would be the most difficult time of his life.  He was a rescue professional, but more importantly he was a born and raised New Yorker, only coming to Los Angeles to persue his stunt carreer.  His heart was there at ground zero.  He called me from his cell, in the middle of it all to tell me those fourteen men, were lost, and that the devistation was not to be believed.  My 6'3" , 230 lbs.  husband wept like a child, as he tried to describe what had happened to them.  

Today, on the 1st anniversary of 9/11, my eight year old son, Vincent, announced that he wants to be in the Army, so that he can defend his country and CONTRIBUTE.

This is my contribution to them, and all the "Sons" of our great nation.  GOD BLESS AMERICA!

Julie Michaels-Piemonte
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              <text>Bill and I were up getting dressed for work and listening to the radio.  At the first report of a plane hitting the towers in New York, we turned on the television.  We both commented how tragic it was for a pilot to become that disoriented and actually hit a building.  As the news events occured and the reality of the situation settled in it was unbelievable.  We both watched the news as the pictures revealed what words failed to adequately express.  We still could not believe it, even as the station repeated the broadcast, over and over.  I was stunned.  Like a robot, I continued to get ready for work.  It then struck me.  I teach special education classes at a local high school.  What were we going to do about this event and its effects on the students?  When I arrived in to my school, the new was on the television in the staff room.  There was a hastily called staff meeting.  We were asked to maintain as normal a schedule as possible.  We were to answer questions as honestly as possible, discuss when it seemed to be a student need, but to try to continue with our planned lessons.  The students were in shock.  Some made jokes as teenagers often do when they do not know how to cope.  Some sat silently; some went on as if nothing had happened.  It was difficult for me to respect all of these different forms of reaction.  I would go to the next room, watch snipits of the news and come back to the room and let the students know what was happening.  I was really very proud of my kids.  They maintained, they worked, they asked thoughtful questions, they came through.  It was a learning and teachable moment that I hope I never need to live through again.  Our principal's daughter was in her apartment only blocks from the site.  She was safe.  My girlfriends sister also lives close, she was safe.  Although I do not know anyone personally affected by these events, I feel somehow connected.  My heart is with them and their families.  </text>
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              <text>I was the Senior Operations Manager for NY Waterways.  My office was in Hoboken.  When I heard over my radio that a plane had hit the WTC I immediately headed out to our terminal at The World Financial Center.  Whenever there is an incident in the area, (PATH breakdown, the last bombing of the WTC,) we get bombarded with riders.  When I got to the terminal people were already streaming out toward the ferry. Many were quite panicked.  My first thought, (though misguided in hindsight,) was to keep calm, and to establish a sense of normality.  Normally when there is an incident we put out garbage cans and collect the tickets and cash up on land to keep the flow of people moving.  So that is what I did.  Unfortunately.  I can't help but to think of all of those people who have a vision of me collecting cash on that horrible day.  I just wanted to apologize to them, and to explain what I was trying to do.  I feel horrible about it, and just want them to know that none of that money went to me.  (I have frequently been mistaken for one of the owners.)  I was just going along with normal procedures, trying to keep things orderly.  If any of you reading this remember me, please accept my apology.  At that time we were not yet aware of the seriousness of the situation.

Finally, a Police officer came over and told me to let the people on for free.  I told him that I did not have that authority.  He told me he did, and thereby authorized it.  I thanked him profusely, and we went on to take over 150,000 people out of the city that day.

I would just like to add that on that day, I saw the true New York that everyone knows lies beneath the usual reputation.  NYC became one big village that day.  I was amazed at the calm and orderly evacuation.  Think about that.  The calm and orderly evacuation of NYC!  We couldn't even get an orderly fire drill at my grammar school!  New Yorkers really stepped up to the plate that day.  I must admit, the kindest and most caring were the people we took over to BROOKLYN!  Often given the worst rap for attitude, they were absolutely the best!
I Love New York, and we will all be better than ever, because of whom we are, inside.
Thank You 911 Digital Archives for allowing me to post this.
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              <text>On September 11 I was in my Social Studies class in R.E.BYRD when my teacher Mrs.Magat when she gets a call from her brother that is in the army and heard that a plane hit the World Trade center.Mrs.Magat turned on the tv and watched the twin tower fall to the ground. When I went home I turned on my tv on and I watched tv for about a hour</text>
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              <text>It was just the beginning of my anatomy and physiology class at a local community college.  All of a sudden, a man that worked in the cashier's office burst through the door.  He said that there had been an attack on the pentagon.  We all got real quiet.  I remember he said something about an air plane, and then he left and went to the next class room.  We all just looked at each other for a minute.  Someone got up and tried to turn on the television, but we didn't have a cable hook up in the room, so we went next door where we had a radio.  We all went next door and sat on the table tops all around the radio.  Someone turned the radio on to one of the a.m. stations.  Then we heard about the plane that hit the world trade center.  And then we heard about the second one.  I remember that I was trying to keep from crying.  Everyone was just so quiet.  And then they said that one of the towers had collapsed.  I don't know how long we stayed in that room, but we went back to the classroom next door.  She said that we could go home if we wanted, she was going to do a quick review (we had a test the next week)and then she was going to leave.  Two girls left, they had family  in that area and they were really shaken.  I remember her leading us in a moment of silence/prayer before they left.  We did the review and we left.  On the way home, I turned it to a news station and heard about the plane that went down in a small town in Pennsylvania.  At that point I almost lost it.  They didn't say what town, and I was freaking out.  My mom lives in a small town in Pennsylvania.  I was just trying to hold myself together on that long 45-minute drive home.  When I got home my grandmother had the t.v. on, and I saw what it all looked like for the first time.  It was horrible, all the black smoke, the people covered in ash, the people inside the buildings that would never come out.  And I watched as the second tower collapsed.  At some point, my uncle had come in and he was sitting there quite, watching it all, tears coming down his face.  I remember being so relieved when they announced the name of the town in Pennsylvanina.  It wasn't where my mom lived.  The rest of the day went by in a blur.  Everyone was afriad of what would happen next. Where the next strike would be.  The news kept coming.  I remember watching the masses of people walking across the bridge to get out of the city.  The President speaking; the Vice-President being hidden away in a cave somewhere; and the media telling every move that the President made that day.  I don't remeber much else from that awful day.  I don't remember eating, getting a shower, or even going to bed.  I just remember watching t.v. for the rest of the day, scared of what would come next, and crying. </text>
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              <text>I am a social worker and on that day was late for work.  I ran out of my apartment when i saw on t.v that a plane had crashed into the tower.  I thought that it was an accident and thought that i might be needed for trauma intervention.  I work at 26 Federal Plaza as a counselor to federal employees.  I was mad at myself that on this day of all days, I was late for work and was not there when the first plane hit.  I imagined that Federal Plaza was being evacuated and how could I not be there to help-out!  While on the subway, heading downtown, an annoucement came on saying that the twoer had been hit and that the subway car would not go south of Chambers Street.  Again, at this point I am made at myself for not being there already and I was anxious to get there asap.  I'll never forget on the subway car, this old couple saying that they were on their way down to the world Trade Center Observation Deck as they were tourists.  They said calmly to themselves, but others could hear them, that they would simply change their plans for the morning and go to the Statue of Liberty instead.  Innocence was still present.  

Minutes later, I was on the street downtown. My beeper was going off as I had been paged by my remote base office in Atlanta.  They told me that there had been a disaster but by this point I was staring right at the scene, and told them that it was like a war zone.  My cell phone continued to work and I explained to them that I would try to get down to Federal Plaza, and call them from there.  I walked as far South as I could go but it seemed as the whole downtown area had been bombed.  Little did I know that the towers had fallen while I was on the subway.  There was such thick smoke I could not see the towers so I assumed it was just a bomb.  To my horror, poeple were running with soot covered faces and blood on their cheeks.  Next to the street was a Con Edison Electric truck.  The radio was blarring from the truck and I paused to listen:  it was Mayor Guillianni saying, "Please evacuate lower Manhattan.  Please get yourselves North of Canal Street."  I called my supervisor back by using my cell phone and told him that I was confused as to how I could help, what should I do?  Although in Atlanta, he told me that he was listening to the radio and that the towers had been hit by terrorists and that I should just keep walking uptown to safety.  

At this point I watched in horror, feeling immobolized as people walked up the street.  People in business clothes and shoes walking like shell-shocked victims of war.  The scene was like a bad movie.  
Suddenly, a loud boom.  People started running.  I know now that a car must have back-fired, but at the time it sounded like another bomb.  And people were already hysterical thus this noise only exacerbated the situation.  I slid myself next to a building alcove and waited until more people had run by.  I felt shocked and confused by the scene.  It was hard to comprehend that an "attack" had taken place.  I called my supervisor back and my cell phone worked again!  My supervisor was a g-dsend and talked to me as I started the walk, 6 miles, home.  He was calm and supportive and reminded me that as a social worker I would be needed, but not right now. He also called my family who reside in Philadephia and told them that I was safe.  

As I walked uptown, people walked right through the streets as the streets were already closed off to cars and buses.  It was a strange walk home for as I walked I picked up more information from people on the street and from radios on the sidewalks.  I'll never forget this fruit stand that had a radio:  people were gathered around it to hear the latest report.  It was at this fruit stand that I learned that another plane had crashed in PA and D.C.  
     
When I got home I was exhausted physically and emotionally but my 9/11 experience had only just started.  Two days after 9/11, I began to run groups for survivors and employees affected by the tragedy.  It was a hard time for me because I felt that I had to suppress some of my own responses and reactions in order to run groups for others.  I collapsed at the end of every day.  It was a fatigue that I have never felt before and hope to never feel again. I led groups almost every day until about November.  I saw many individuals too who needed counseling.  

Back in Federal Plaza, weeks later, we had to buy air purifyers for our office, even though we were up on the 33rd floor and had all our windows permanently shut!  The air quality was poor for months.  People walked around outside with masks on.  We also were plagued by the helicopters flying over head all day long.  

Yesterday, 9/10/2002, I attended the commemoration ceremony at Federal Plaza.  I cried my eyes out as I finally had an opportunity to self-reflect as a person not as a social worker.  I recall the courage of many, the fear and loss by all, and the resiliency that has allowed us to begin to heal.
I still provide groups for employee struggling with 9/11 and I talk about how there is no return to "normal, rather we have to create a new normal for ourselves."
Jennifer Cabot Finkelstein       </text>
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