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              <text>You aren't in the city are you? 
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              <text>Julie Stein</text>
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a friend living overseas wrote:


&gt; I read the president's speech on CNN website as well as an article about a
&gt; hockey game being cancelled to listen to the speech. Quite moving and
&gt; impressive.
&gt;
&gt; Now I want to hear from you  about what you are hearing and feeling and
&gt; thinking...be my window on the world back home, please! 
&gt;


Sigh.......
I have no idea where to begin...

To tell you that I cry myself to sleep? When I can sleep...
To tell you that the moment I wake, I cry?

That, with every breath, I beg, I BEG God not to take my sons ( into the Military)?

One of the greatest joys of my life was my safety in this country. It is gone.
I rejoiced in the inherent security I enjoyed. While I suffered with other
populations at war, in famine.. I was comforted that we were 'safe'.
I have never spoken one ill word against America. I have cherished my life in
this country.

 I know you have lived in areas outside of the U.S. I know you have seen
many conditions that I have not and it is it my intention to sound like an
isolationist.
Simply, I am trying to come to terms with my grief. While I mourn for all the
mothers, fathers and children that were murdered and I know some of them...I
also mourn for the feeling of safety, the security I so loved.

I feel that I have led a better life than my children will...
Not economically; although that may  prove to be true as well, but the peace
that was a part of my being will not be with them.
Never did I look into the sky and fear an airplane. Never did I listen to a
President addressing Congress as we went to war
My generation lived after WWII and before September 11, 2001. It was a
privileged existence and it is gone.
Many of those that lost their lives were of my generation. May they rest in
Peace. May they not suffer the fear that we now know.

The fear that was born on that day will live with my children forever. How will
it change their lives? How will it change their souls?

You ask what the U.S. is like today.

We are weeping.
It has been 10 days and we are still weeping.
We hang our flags and wear our ribbons to honor a country that has changed.
We want to act normally but there is no normal. We seem to be walking in
circles...

But, we are together. You need only to look into another's eyes to know what
they are thinking.
To know that they, too, are struggling with great grief. To see their resolve.
We will do what we must.


I know you are craving specifics, Cathy. Perhaps, I just can't acknowledge
anything specific yet...

I live 75 miles west of Washington, DC and about 150 miles south of New York
City. Everyone, everyone, I know has lost someone.

Seeing the photos of the last 10 days is helpful to me.


Others would not want to view them but I find them necessary to my being able
to accept this. I tell myself, "That was then, this is now", "That was then,
this is now", one million times a day as I struggle to accept this new America.
I force myself into a place where everything is different, where our very
landmarks are changed.

-J


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              <text>----- Original Message -----
From: Keith Riggle &amp; Paula Pebsworth 
Sent: Friday, September 14, 2001 10:12 AM
Subject: We're Fine

I'm fine, just tired from working 44 of the last 72 hours and getting only about 10 hours of sleep the whole time.  I just about fell asleep at the wheel on the way home.  Not used to sleeping during the day (especially with a toddler running around).  I'm still in shock over what happened.  I was working in my office Tuesday when one of my troops came in and asked me if I had heard that 2 planes had just crashed into the World Trade Center towers.  Naturally I didn't believe him and was trying to get CNN on line, when we heard/felt a loud explosion.  We sometimes have military jets fly over the Pentagon, so at first I thought maybe it was a sonic boom.  But I pulled up my blinds and looking out the window I saw a cloud of smoke and debris wafting over the building.  I told my secretary, "Let's get the hell out of here.  I don't know where we're going to go, but let's get out."  Soon thereafter the alarms went off.  People actually evacuated the building pretty calmy, just like it was a fire drill or bomb threat (which we do occasionally have).  As we exited the building, we could see a huge cloud of black smoke that smelled like burning fuel billowing over the building.  Our offices are on the south side of the building off corridor 2 in the innermost ring, the A ring, on the 5th floor.  The plane crashed just arround the corner on the west side of the building into the outermost rings; I understand that it pentrated through the E and D rings into the C ring at about the 4th corridor.  Fortunately, that portion of the Pentagon had been recently rennovated, and a lot of the offices hadn't been occupied yet.

We all stood at the outer edge of the parking look and watched in disbelief. Rumors were flying about what had happened.  The plane crashed near the helo pad, so some people thought it was a helicopter.  But some people actually saw the plane crash.  I walked around trying to account for all my people (about 50 of them), but they had taken different exits and scattered to the four winds.  Some of them immediately went home; others went to a nearby shopping mall.  As I was standing talking to some people from another office, the police started backing their vehicles away and screaming at everyone to get away as there was another plane.  Apparently there were reports of another plane that was unaccounted for.  So I went over to the mall myself, and caught a Metro train to a couple stops down the line, where Paula picked me up and took me home.  My car is still parked in the Pentagon parking lot.

When I got home, I initiated a telephone pyramid recall to account for all my people.  It took a few hours, but we finally got a hold of everyone to make sure they made it home or were accounted for.  Two people stayed at the Pentagon to help with the wounded.

I had to report to Bolling Air Force Base in DC at 7 PM to work a 12-hour shift.  We are responsible for notifying the next of kin of any casualties (everything from minor injuries to deaths) and assisting NOK of deceased with benefits.  We also had to try to account for the 9,000 Air Force people who work in and around the Pentagon, an almost impossible task, especially for those assigned to DoD agencies (as opposed to those assigned directly to Air Force organizations).  During my shift we received reports of only 3 injured Air Force people.  Not many Air Force people are assigned to that part of the building--it's mostly Navy and Army.  However, hospitals weren't releasing any information to us over the phone, and we had to send reps physically to the hospitals to get it.  In addition, the fire was still burning yesterday morning, but it's been put out now and they've started recovering bodies. I had 2 troops working in 6-hour shifts in the recovery area in the event any Air Force personnel were identified.  They said the scene was pretty gruesome and that most of the bodies were burned pretty badly.  They've recovered about 50 bodies so far, with 100-200 people still unaccounted for, including the passengers on the plane. The last I heard, about 90 people had been injured. 

I think we all know that these attacks will have a profound impact on life in the US and how we see ourselves and the world.  It's going to take a long time to find out who was responsible for these attacks, and we will probably never know with any certainty.  I don't doubt that the US will respond with military action, just as we did after the Embassy bombings in Africa. But I know I'll never feel comfortable flying again.

Please tell everyone hello for us and let us know how you are doing. Thank you for thinking of me.

Keith</text>
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              <text>-----Original Message-----
From: Steward, Chris (MLIM) [mailto:Chris_Steward@ml.com]
Sent: Tuesday, September 11, 2001 9:49 AM

Subject: RE: Breaking NEWS


What I can't believe is that there is someone actually sitting back and laughing at this.....and enjoying every minute of it!!!

-----Original Message-----
From: Loiseau, Julie [mailto:jloiseau@dynamicdigital.com]
Sent: Tuesday, September 11, 2001 9:48 AM

Subject: RE: Breaking NEWS


It's horrible!  I wish I had a TV here though........ Joe called me 4 times,
my mom called once in tears........... she saw the 2nd one actually happen
because she was watching the news about the 1st one and then all of a sudden
the 2nd one hit - totally planned by the terrorists - they are probably
patting themselves on the back while thousands of people are dead,
suffering!!!!!!!!!!

There is fire at the Pentagon (A plane crashed there too!) and "black smoke"
at the Whitehouse now too!!!!!!!!!!  They're getting us all over!!!!!!!!
My mom called again freaking out.... they are getting us at every possible
angle!

-----Original Message-----
From: Steward, Chris (MLIM) [mailto:Chris_Steward@ml.com]
Sent: Tuesday, September 11, 2001 9:41 AM

Subject: RE: Breaking NEWS


I can not believe this......

-----Original Message-----
From: Tammy M. Fahringer [mailto:tfahringer@finsvcs.com]
Sent: Tuesday, September 11, 2001 9:44 AM

Subject: RE: Breaking NEWS


Yeah, everyone here is watching it now.  Our company owns Oppenheimer funds
and their headquarters are in the World Trade Center.  Our head honchos are
in that building.

-----Original Message-----
From: Steward, Chris (MLIM) [mailto:Chris_Steward@ml.com]
Sent: Tuesday, September 11, 2001 9:31 AM

Subject: RE: Breaking NEWS


I was just watching it on TV....We have ML people in there

-----Original Message-----
From: Loiseau, Julie [mailto:jloiseau@dynamicdigital.com]
Sent: Tuesday, September 11, 2001 9:11 AM

Subject: Breaking NEWS


Both World Trade Center Towers were just hit by planes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Terrorists!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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              <text>From: David Simon Bendory (david90@alumni.princeton.edu)
Subject: No Words to Describe 
Newsgroups: soc.genealogy.jewish
Date: 2001-09-17 14:37:13 PST 
 
Tens of people responded to my earlier story of my GGM's siddur, trapped in the wreckage of the World Trade Center. Several encouraged me to have faith: after surviving pogroms in Hungary, the journey to America, and 3 generations of my family, the siddur would surely survive this calamity as well.

Well, it seems that the presence of my siddur saved One Liberty Plaza, which is not only standing but also structurally sound -- in spite of earlier reports of its collapse.

As to my siddur, it has been retrieved and is safely in the hands of a friend who will personally deliver it to me tonight in time for Rosh HaShannah.

Earlier, I said that I have no words to describe the catastrophe from which I narrowly escaped. I now have no words to describe the miracle which has emerged from that same catastrophe.

God willing, there are more miracles to come, in the form of survivors who emerge from the debris.

Shanah tovah,

David Simon Bendory
Livingston, NJ
david90@alumni.princeton.edu
Looking for Hungarian KOHN, POPPER, BRAUCH, HECHT in Resita, Timisoara, Anina
Looking for Romanian SCHWARTZ or SIEGAL, VACSMAN in Botosani or Braila, Romania
Looking for Romanian HARR near Bucharest, Romania
Looking for SIMON and GOETZ from Germany
http://familytreemaker.genealogy.com/users/s/i/m/David-E-Simon/index.html</text>
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babs,

i'm ok.  my dad's fine.  i don't know about anyone else from the island.  i didn't even have time to think about all the islanders who worked at the wtc.  we've all been heoping that pepople arrived late for work yesterday.  manhattan is in a very surreal state right now.  it's all i can manage to just sit down and try to do my work.

i'm hoping you've spoken to your family bynow. if not, please let me know and i willtry to contact them. within the city the circuits are much better.  if i get any news about SI, i will let you know.

thanks for emailing.  please donate blood.

-frank.

At 08:02 PM 9/11/01, you wrote:
Can't get in touch with anyone in NYC. All circuits busy.  SI, NY mast be 
horrible.  So many people worked in the WTC.  I haven't been able to reach my 
folks and brother, but they would have had no reason to be by the WTC.  What 
do you know?  My thoughts and prayers are with everyone right now. 

Love and green ices, 

Barbara 
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              <elementText elementTextId="460122">
                <text>2002-02-13</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
          <element elementId="62">
            <name>IP Address</name>
            <description>The IP address of the device used to submit the item.</description>
            <elementTextContainer>
              <elementText elementTextId="460123">
                <text>63.107.247.5</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
          <element elementId="63">
            <name>Annotation</name>
            <description>Annotations to this item.</description>
            <elementTextContainer>
              <elementText elementTextId="460124">
                <text>Telephones and Cell Phones&#13;
</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
        </elementContainer>
      </elementSet>
    </elementSetContainer>
  </item>
  <item itemId="36917" public="1" featured="0">
    <collection collectionId="29">
      <elementSetContainer>
        <elementSet elementSetId="1">
          <name>Dublin Core</name>
          <description>The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/.</description>
          <elementContainer>
            <element elementId="50">
              <name>Title</name>
              <description>A name given to the resource</description>
              <elementTextContainer>
                <elementText elementTextId="456412">
                  <text>September 11 Digital Archive Emails</text>
                </elementText>
              </elementTextContainer>
            </element>
            <element elementId="41">
              <name>Description</name>
              <description>An account of the resource</description>
              <elementTextContainer>
                <elementText elementTextId="456413">
                  <text>This collection contains emails which were sent or received on or around September 11, 2001.  As of this writing individuals have submitted more than 1,500 correspondences.</text>
                </elementText>
              </elementTextContainer>
            </element>
          </elementContainer>
        </elementSet>
      </elementSetContainer>
    </collection>
    <itemType itemTypeId="18">
      <name>September 11 Email</name>
      <description/>
      <elementContainer>
        <element elementId="65">
          <name>September 11 Email: Body</name>
          <description>The basic content, as unstructured text; sometimes containing a signature block at the end.</description>
          <elementTextContainer>
            <elementText elementTextId="460005">
              <text>&gt;From: Deb Dreyfuss-Tuchman &lt;ddt@videoaxs.com&gt;
&gt;Subject: In Jonathan's Words
&gt;
&gt;&gt;Friends, Family, Co-workers:
&gt;
&gt;My slightly offbeat nephew is, we thank God alive. Would but for his 
&gt;missing a train and wanting to grab a PowerBar, he would have been on an 
&gt;elevator and our family would have been one of those ones not receiving 
&gt;the joyful news we did. In his own, shall we say colorful words, Jonathan 
&gt;describes not only the horror, but the humanity of Tuesday in New York. I 
&gt;share this because it is powerful and for me will make me remember to 
&gt;truly appreciate him and each moment of life.
&gt;
&gt;Much love,
&gt;Deb
&gt;
&gt;
&gt;----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
&gt;
&gt;
&gt;&gt;Family, friends, east side, west side, and elsewhere:
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;I am okay.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Everyone from my office is okay.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;I was about to get on the elevator when the first plane hit.
&gt;&gt;Had I been 1 minute earlier, I would have been on the elevator,
&gt;&gt;and thus dead.  I have never been so glad to miss the first
&gt;&gt;NR train than I was Tuesday morning.  Some vaguely hobgoblinesque
&gt;&gt;(or maybe troll, you know, the squat, slow-moving, almost cubic
&gt;&gt;sort of shuffling mound) woman caused me to miss said train by
&gt;&gt;30 seconds, and thus, in her own irritating way, helped me live.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;The sound it makes when a 500000 pound airplane hits a building
&gt;&gt;you're in is pretty fucking amazing.  Speak the word 'shoom'
&gt;&gt;aloud.  Now pretend that word is being spoken by a 110 story
&gt;&gt;ventilation system at about 100 dB.  Interestingly enough, the
&gt;&gt;way speaking the word aloud makes your lungs and diaphram feel
&gt;&gt;is pretty similar to the way the shockwave felt across my
&gt;&gt;whole body, only obviously much smaller.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Anyway, so this humongous 'sh-OOOM' hits and simultaneously the
&gt;&gt;entire ceiling appears to fall in as an enormous upside-down
&gt;&gt;wave of thick, choking smoke tsunami'd from the glass doors
&gt;&gt;ahead of me.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;My immediate thought was that it was some sort of gas-based
&gt;&gt;attack, because the smoke was very vivid and dense and just
&gt;&gt;sort of rolled toward me in slow motion.  I cleverly reasoned
&gt;&gt;that I should run like hell.  Also, I held my breath.  15
&gt;&gt;strides later, I noticed that I was a: not breathing and b:
&gt;&gt;covered in smoke.  This allowed me to deduce that it was not
&gt;&gt;a gas attack, since I'd be too busy dying to deduce stuff
&gt;&gt;if it was.  I was more or less running like hell as this thought
&gt;&gt;process took place.  Either there was not much screaming or
&gt;&gt;I just didn't hear any.  An old lady fell down next to me and
&gt;&gt;as I tried to help her up someone crashed into me.  I got up
&gt;&gt;and helped her up and then ran up the stairs and out of the
&gt;&gt;building.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;It appeared to be raining.  Actually, it appeared that shit
&gt;&gt;was falling from the sky.  Wait, in fact, it was. "Hmm," I
&gt;&gt;thought, "it appears to be snowing file cabinets."
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;I decided it was probably relatively safe because nothing
&gt;&gt;heavy was falling (yet), but I wanted to see what had happened
&gt;&gt;so I walked across the street to this deli that I eat at
&gt;&gt;sometimes.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;There was an enormous, flaming hole in my building.  I
&gt;&gt;figured a bomb had gone off.  The entire side of the building
&gt;&gt;was on fire, and an enormous amount of paper was in the air.
&gt;&gt;(People I know in south brooklyn found documents from the
&gt;&gt;aircraft in their back yards, and it rained glass in DUMBO.)
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;At this point the thought popped into my head, fully formed,
&gt;&gt;"Gee, I hope my coworkers aren't dead."  This was slightly
&gt;&gt;irritating to me as I thought my mind should have conjured
&gt;&gt;a more eloquent expression of concern, or possibly even an
&gt;&gt;emotional response, but alas..
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;So anyway I'm standing there looking at this big-ass hole
&gt;&gt;in the building, and it's on fire, and people are talking about
&gt;&gt;how a plane hit the building.  I figured that was bullshit.
&gt;&gt;Someone mentioned a twin-engine craft, and I did a quick
&gt;&gt;mental calculation of how much Astrolite A-1-5 or RDX you
&gt;&gt;could fit into a ~10-seat prop plane, and realized there
&gt;&gt;was no way that would put an 8 story hole all the way through
&gt;&gt;the WTC.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Right about this time, as I'm doing this sort of tangential
&gt;&gt;analysis, the second building got hit.  From where I was
&gt;&gt;standing we could not see the plane at all.  I have no memory
&gt;&gt;of a sound, either.  Just a new, smaller hole, lower, and
&gt;&gt;on the other building.  Also, on fire.  Also, a huge hunk
&gt;&gt;of rubble flew off and hit the AT&amp;T building next door
&gt;&gt;whereupon the top of that building caught fire.  (Hosing
&gt;&gt;cellular, TV, etc..)
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;I guess the plane hit the other side of the building from
&gt;&gt;where I was standing, because the hole looked really small
&gt;&gt;compared to the one in WTC1.  On the street we all figured
&gt;&gt;that a bomb had gone off in WTC2, or that a missile had
&gt;&gt;hit it, or something.  Nobody knew it was a plane, at least
&gt;&gt;where I was standing.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;So at this point I'm just standing there looking at these
&gt;&gt;two beautiful buildings burning.  It was one of the most
&gt;&gt;beautiful mornings in recent memory, not a cloud in the
&gt;&gt;sky, 78 or 80 degrees, just beautiful.  And it was quite
&gt;&gt;a tableaux, these pillars of industry, towers of babylon
&gt;&gt;or what have you (gosh I like that expression), burning in
&gt;&gt;the morning sun.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Hmm, speaking of morning, I'm not really sure what happened
&gt;&gt;to the coffee I was drinking when the plane hit the first
&gt;&gt;time.  I had been awake for less than 40 minutes.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Watching the buildings I saw some objects falling straight
&gt;&gt;down, in contrast to the lighter stuff that was just filling
&gt;&gt;the air like some kind of sick tickertape parade.  I said
&gt;&gt;something to the effect of my, those objects must be heavy,
&gt;&gt;they're falling awful straight.  Someone said, "Dude, those
&gt;&gt;are people."  I couldn't fucking believe it.  It wasn't
&gt;&gt;just people, it was A LOT OF PEOPLE.  After the first dozen
&gt;&gt;I just couldn't stand it, and I turned around and walked
&gt;&gt;away, north.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;I stopped in front of the federal building to turn around
&gt;&gt;and gawk, and then realized that was probably a poor choice
&gt;&gt;of location in a terrorist war zone.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Groups of people were huddled around radios, in shock,
&gt;&gt;listening.  The calm and reasonable way the citizens of
&gt;&gt;NYC handled themselves was ASTONISHING.  People were
&gt;&gt;walking briskly but not running, other people were calming
&gt;&gt;those in histrionics, etc.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;I figured well, I can't go home unless I walk across the
&gt;&gt;bridge to Brooklyn, and since I've had such a rough morning
&gt;&gt;I really don't feel like walking to Brooklyn, so I better
&gt;&gt;go find a bar and get a beer.  Even if it was 9:15 am.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Unfortunately, modulo terrorist attacks, there is little
&gt;&gt;demand for bars in downtown manhattan at 9:15 am on a
&gt;&gt;tuesday.  So I proceeded north, thinking, "dammit, I will
&gt;&gt;find a beer."  [Note: beer from a bodega was not an
&gt;&gt;option because the last time I'd seen someone do that
&gt;&gt;(well, actually, encouraged them) I accidentally got these
&gt;&gt;two idiot brokers from Jersey ticketed when they failed
&gt;&gt;to recognize my slang ("six-up!") for "there's a cop
&gt;&gt;driving by, put your beer down."]
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Anyhoo, (got distracted there, sorry, forgot to take my
&gt;&gt;ADD meds today), headed north to ~houston and sullivan.
&gt;&gt;No bars open.  Okay, fuck it.  There are lines 10 deep
&gt;&gt;at the payphones, which don't work anyway.  I wait for
&gt;&gt;one, since I didn't really have anything else to do.
&gt;&gt;As soon as I try dial 1800COLLECT (damn, it was that
&gt;&gt;ad with mister t) people start screaming from the
&gt;&gt;corner, crying, and really, really losing it.  There
&gt;&gt;was a straight view down sullivan to the WTC complex,
&gt;&gt;where instead of 2 buildings, there was now 1 and an
&gt;&gt;enormous plume of smoke.  Like a mushroom cloud.  Over
&gt;&gt;manhattan.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;After being hugged by some dred with a table selling
&gt;&gt;fake sunglasses and rapping with him for a little bit,
&gt;&gt;I decided to use the phone again.  Once again, as soon
&gt;&gt;as I started to put my call through, the other goddamn
&gt;&gt;building fell down.  Where there used to be two enormous
&gt;&gt;buildings, there was nothing but fire, smoke, and chaos.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;At this point I'm having a really, really shitty morning.
&gt;&gt;So I sit down on the ground and petulantly jut out my lip
&gt;&gt;in the hopes that some knight errant, perhaps a female one,
&gt;&gt;will come and provide me with something better to do with
&gt;&gt;my morning than sitting on the ground hugging my knees and
&gt;&gt;rocking back and forth in the middle of a war zone.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;This occurs.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Some dutch woman gives me a hug and helps me up, and we
&gt;&gt;decide to walk up the west side highway to 63rd street
&gt;&gt;where she works.  We had a brisk walk.  It was such a
&gt;&gt;nice day out.  I kept being struck by that.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;As we reached chelsea piers I was suddenly struck by the
&gt;&gt;urge to go to their driving range.  [They have a driving
&gt;&gt;range where you can hit golf balls into the river, and
&gt;&gt;it basically faces the now-missing WTC complex.]  Ironically,
&gt;&gt;she was having the same idea.  It's unclear why, but it
&gt;&gt;just seemed like the only appropriate thing to do.  We
&gt;&gt;tried to execute on this plan, but unfortunately the piers
&gt;&gt;were occupied by medical workers doing stuff involving
&gt;&gt;ambulances, stretchers, and really damaged human bodies,
&gt;&gt;who didn't appear too interested in allowing us to complete
&gt;&gt;our mental scene.  Bother.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;So we walked up to the hotel, I made some phone calls,
&gt;&gt;discovered that my ssh applet wouldn't work through their
&gt;&gt;goddamn firewall, swore a little bit about my lack of
&gt;&gt;internet access (the only meaningful kind of internet
&gt;&gt;access is a shell account--I mean what is this everything-
&gt;&gt;over-HTTP crap anyway #*@!@!#).
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;This woman (whose name I don't think I ever got) booked a
&gt;&gt;room at the hotel for me, on her, but I figured I'd just
&gt;&gt;jet down to my friend's house at 29th street.  She attempted
&gt;&gt;to get me a beer from the bar, but the bartender was missing.
&gt;&gt;So I just gave her a hug, and jetted.  (Oh, another amusing
&gt;&gt;anecdote, as we walked down the street we passed a fella
&gt;&gt;unloading a Grolsch truck and she attempted to obtain beers
&gt;&gt;from him by repeatedly insisting, "I'm DUTCH, dammit.  I'm
&gt;&gt;DUTCH!".  He was not interested.)
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;So yeah.  That's the corpus of the story.  I've basically
&gt;&gt;spent the last two days sitting around with friends who
&gt;&gt;lost many of their professional and personal relations,
&gt;&gt;watching CNN, and wondering what the hell to do.  I have
&gt;&gt;no office, it's unclear if I have a job, it's unclear if
&gt;&gt;the software we spent a year building is gone (the
&gt;&gt;'off-site' backup was in 1WFC next door, which may or
&gt;&gt;may not fall down and is in any case completely destroyed.)
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;But I'm alive.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Now a brief answer to some of the press conference Q&amp;A:
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; Exactly how much porn did you lose on your office computer[lr]?
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;None.  We don't have office doors.  Hmm.  Now that I think of
&gt;&gt;it, we *REALLY* don't have office doors.  I did lose about 10
&gt;&gt;gigs of MP3s and a bunch of perl scripts.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; Did you take the elevator or the stairs to get out[lr]?
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;No.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; What floor did you work on[lr]?
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;46.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; What did it feel like when the first plane hit your building[lr]?
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;See the above description involving the onomonopoetic
&gt;&gt;characteristics of the word 'shoom', which may have been
&gt;&gt;evocative in the way I intended or simply just a bit
&gt;&gt;manic and effusive.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;It really did feel like 'shoom', though.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; How was the evacuation announced[kmc]?
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;PA system.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; Does the hand of god...tickle[lr]?
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;It's not clear that I'm any more conventionally religious than
&gt;&gt;I was before this.  I don't remember invoking 'god' at any time.
&gt;&gt;If there is a god, though, thanks, I owe you one.  I actually
&gt;&gt;felt like I should pray or something but to date have not
&gt;&gt;defined a mode of communication appropriate to express my
&gt;&gt;relationship with the divine.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; Are you glad you bought glasses in time to see your way out?[kmc]
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Yeah, although I mostly got them cause they look cute.  :)
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; What do your new glasses look like[kmc]? /insert photo here--&gt;
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;http://resin.csoft.net/~jdc/my-name-is-dieter-glasses.jpg
&gt;&gt;http://resin.csoft.net/~jdc/business-casual-ha-ha-glasses.jpg
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Please excuse the condition of my pores, skin, and unibrow.
&gt;&gt;Exfoliation and tweezing have not been my strong points this
&gt;&gt;week, and jet fuel smoke is about the least noncomedogenic
&gt;&gt;thing I can think of except maybe lard.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; How do you feel about the loss of Saleem's beloved grey squirrel[lr/kmc]?
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;It's a tragedy.  I offered to help him build a mylar pyramid to
&gt;&gt;bury it in, but he demurred.  Perhaps a weekend's squirrel-fishing
&gt;&gt;would yield another fuzzy playmate.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; Where were you when the buildings collapsed? How did you get out of 
&gt;&gt; the way[mdz]?
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;See above, but as an aside:
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;You know that Quasimoto song where he goes, "...come on feeet...walk for 
&gt;&gt;me..."
&gt;&gt;over and over again?  By repeating that in my head.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; What is the most terrible thing you saw? Most heroic[mdz]?
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;People jumping out by the dozen.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;The UTTERLY, UTTERLY wonderful behavior of all the people on
&gt;&gt;the street.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; How long did it take you to get out of the building? Did you have to 
&gt;&gt; run down 71 flights of stairs?[ks]
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;It took the dudes on 46 25 minutes to get down.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Said and I did this before for the hell of it and it's quite a
&gt;&gt;long way.  Probably a lot longer with a bunch of scared people
&gt;&gt;going down and firefighters running up.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; Have you been able to work out a way to use this to pick up chicks?
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Well, kinda, but she was married and the driving range we tried to
&gt;&gt;go on a date at was closed.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; Have you come to any great life decisions because of this event? [sHouse]
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Working in a huge building that has already been a bombing target is
&gt;&gt;not smart.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Fire is real hot.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;New Yorkers are good people.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; &gt; Did those plane tickets escape the WTC or did you lose them as I 
&gt;&gt; predicted? --hh
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Alas, two separate sets of tickets are lost.  Also, my keyboard,
&gt;&gt;which has been through many timezones, companies, source files,
&gt;&gt;and a thesis with me.  I will miss her.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;Much love,
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;jon
</text>
            </elementText>
          </elementTextContainer>
        </element>
        <element elementId="66">
          <name>September 11 Email: Date</name>
          <description>The local time and date when the message was written.</description>
          <elementTextContainer>
            <elementText elementTextId="460006">
              <text>9/13/2001</text>
            </elementText>
          </elementTextContainer>
        </element>
        <element elementId="67">
          <name>September 11 Email: To</name>
          <description>The email addresses, and optionally names of the message's recipients</description>
          <elementTextContainer>
            <elementText elementTextId="460007">
              <text>ddt@videoaxs.com</text>
            </elementText>
          </elementTextContainer>
        </element>
        <element elementId="68">
          <name>September 11 Email: From</name>
          <description>The email address, and optionally the name of the author.</description>
          <elementTextContainer>
            <elementText elementTextId="460008">
              <text/>
            </elementText>
          </elementTextContainer>
        </element>
        <element elementId="69">
          <name>September 11 Email: CC</name>
          <description>The email addresses of those who received the message addressed primarily to another.</description>
          <elementTextContainer>
            <elementText elementTextId="460009">
              <text/>
            </elementText>
          </elementTextContainer>
        </element>
        <element elementId="70">
          <name>September 11 Email: Subject</name>
          <description>A brief summary of the topic of the message.</description>
          <elementTextContainer>
            <elementText elementTextId="460010">
              <text>In Jonathan's Words</text>
            </elementText>
          </elementTextContainer>
        </element>
      </elementContainer>
    </itemType>
    <elementSetContainer>
      <elementSet elementSetId="1">
        <name>Dublin Core</name>
        <description>The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/.</description>
        <elementContainer>
          <element elementId="50">
            <name>Title</name>
            <description>A name given to the resource</description>
            <elementTextContainer>
              <elementText elementTextId="460011">
                <text>email272.xml</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
        </elementContainer>
      </elementSet>
      <elementSet elementSetId="4">
        <name>911DA Item</name>
        <description>Elements describing a September 11 Digital Archive item.</description>
        <elementContainer>
          <element elementId="52">
            <name>Status</name>
            <description>The process status of this item.</description>
            <elementTextContainer>
              <elementText elementTextId="460012">
                <text>approved</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
          <element elementId="53">
            <name>Consent</name>
            <description>Whether September 11 Digital Archive has permission to possess this item.</description>
            <elementTextContainer>
              <elementText elementTextId="460013">
                <text>full</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
          <element elementId="54">
            <name>Posting</name>
            <description>Whether the contributor gave permission to post this item.</description>
            <elementTextContainer>
              <elementText elementTextId="460014">
                <text>unknown</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
          <element elementId="55">
            <name>Copyright</name>
            <description>Whether the contributor holds copyright to this item.</description>
            <elementTextContainer>
              <elementText elementTextId="460015">
                <text>yes</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
          <element elementId="56">
            <name>Source</name>
            <description>The source of this item.</description>
            <elementTextContainer>
              <elementText elementTextId="460016">
                <text>born-digital</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
          <element elementId="57">
            <name>Media Type</name>
            <description>The media type of this item.</description>
            <elementTextContainer>
              <elementText elementTextId="460017">
                <text>email</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
          <element elementId="59">
            <name>Created by Author</name>
            <description>Whether the author created this item.</description>
            <elementTextContainer>
              <elementText elementTextId="460018">
                <text>unknown</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
          <element elementId="60">
            <name>Described by Author</name>
            <description>Whether the description of this item was submitted by the author.</description>
            <elementTextContainer>
              <elementText elementTextId="460019">
                <text>yes</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
          <element elementId="61">
            <name>Date Entered</name>
            <description>The date this item was entered into the archive.</description>
            <elementTextContainer>
              <elementText elementTextId="460020">
                <text>2002-08-19</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
          <element elementId="62">
            <name>IP Address</name>
            <description>The IP address of the device used to submit the item.</description>
            <elementTextContainer>
              <elementText elementTextId="460021">
                <text>208.186.249.192</text>
              </elementText>
            </elementTextContainer>
          </element>
        </elementContainer>
      </elementSet>
    </elementSetContainer>
  </item>
  <item itemId="36912" public="1" featured="0">
    <collection collectionId="29">
      <elementSetContainer>
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              <text>Hi Tim &amp; Theresa and all,

We are all okay, except real shook up.  I was attending a meeting at Germantown Hospital when we got the first news. I immediately started to drive home. 

On the expressways I can't tell you how many police and other type vehicles went flying past, lights and sirens wailing.  The were going to center city and the airport to step up security.  It is such a horrible shock to see those videos of that airliner crashing into the World Trade
Center. Everyone here is fine.  

Our company headquarters ordered all employees out of any American city at mid-day yesterday. They had each office call every employee and find out where they were, and tell them not to go into the city.  That is really scary.  We are now getting e-mails from our corporate security people giving us instructions on how to step up security and keep our people safe, in case this isn't over.  Let's hope it
is. The telephone lines are screwed up bad in this area.  I couldn't even use my cell phone most of the day, except for the radio portion, which worked fine. 

Love,
Uncle Harry
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              <text>And I suppose the Zionists caused your recent flat tire, too. It seems like nothing bad in this world happens that isn't their fault, according to you. 

&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;"I am quite certain that they did the 
attack - who else would be able to pull it off? Who else benefits from it?"&lt;&lt;&lt;

Question #1: Who else... what? Are you saying, "what other people on this earth has some pilots, some immigrants or tourists in America, enough money to buy plane tickets, and some pocket knives with which to kill the flight crew"? This was not that complicated an attack. The thing I cannot begin to understand is why cockpit doors are flimsy plywood things with what look like easily defeatable locks (I have wondered that before as I boarded planes). If those doors were impenetrable and the policy was never, ever to open them no matter what was happening in the cabin, this kind of thing could not happen.

Question #2: "Who else benefits from it..." Hmm, that seems to be the first time it has occurred to you that when fundamentalists (of whatever stripe, I'm not just talking about Islam) commit terrorism, it doesn't benefit them. We've had this discussion before, regarding whether or not it is helpful to the Palestinian cause for them to commit suicide attacks on Israeli landmarks.

Terrorism never benefits the people who commit it. It gets them killed (either by suicide or, as in Tim McVeigh's case, execution), and it deals a horrific setback to their pet cause. And yet people continue to commit acts of terrorism ad infinitum. When you say that Tuesday's events can't be the work of Islamic fundamentalists, well, that would be a major change: it'd be the first time that those terrorists sat back for a second and thought "Hmm, we could do this awful thing, but we shouldn't because it would make us unpopular."

Have you seen the footage of Palestinians dancing for joy in the streets?

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              <text>                       9/13/01 11:51:59 AM
                 From: 
                       "Alice Wax" &lt;catwax@home.com&gt; 
                       Add to People Section 
                   To: 
                       cath48@pobox.com 
                       Send Again 
                   CC: 
                        
              Subject: 
                       National Military Appreciation Month May 2002 
             MIME Ver: 
                        
          Attachments:
                        

          Catherine, Are you okay? The unspeakable has happened just as predicted. It is like
          a movie with Bruce Willis. 
           
          We are watching the TV continuously, seeing NYC in it's worst and finest hour. Such
          an outpouring of generousity and caring in the face of such vicious destruction. 
           
          Natanyahu has been very articulate in expressing his opinnion about what we must
          do and prepare for. I think he knows more. I hope the US listens to him. This is not
          going away. 
           
          See you in Washington I hope at the Bd. mtg. Love, ALice 
          National Military Appreciation Month May 2002 
           
           
   
                                                                            Next



  
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              <text>We are all safe. Pam is at school tending for students as am I. Nat is home.
Damage localized to lower west side, but no public transport. Tragedy beond
comprehension. JIM
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              <text>4:30 am Sat. Sept. 15

Sophie et al,

I went back to the remains of the World Trade Center and dug for bodies.

There is a staging area at Chelsea Piers where city staff determines if one has useful knowledge or experience to help with the rescue. If they hear some, they tape S&amp;R on you (Search and Rescue) and send you to the Javits Center for dispersal. They send you uptown, not down. Except for iron workers they want no else there and have placed the military at all entrances to prevent anyone getting close. It is a polite run around.

Some iron workers dropped by my loft at 6:00am Thursdayhaving put in an 18-hour shiftand asked if I wanted to go in next time. They weren't sure because they thought that I might have had enough having witnessed it all go down. Of course I wanted to. We went Friday in mid-afternoon: In Queens eleven of us piled into a van and headed for the Brooklyn Bridge to the uncanny sight of the altered skyline. We pulled into a commercial equipment store and helped ourselves to everything we could carry: cases of gloves, masks, crowbars, pails, and respirators, without a thought of paying for it. The shop owner helped us load it; he proudly waved as we drove off.

An ex-cop drove the van with a police parking placard stuck in the window getting us by the first four security checks. Then we approached two HumVees parked across the road at Park Row and Broadway with young men in battle fatigues standing about. National Guard I thought. Then they surrounded the van. Regular Army I thought. And then all six doors were jerked open at once.

Marines. Welcome to Not America. I am in the middle of Manhattan in a private car and armed Marines are ripping open my doors. I felt better already. They snapped our ID's from our hands as fast as we could pull them out. The two in back talked very loud to hold our attention while the others moved in among us. Satisfied, they had us park and motioned us into the site.

We collected our shoplifted gear and walked a quarter mile to the site. The tension in the air was frighteningmilitary vehicles, M-60 machine guns. Hundreds of angry cops. Everybody looking us over. A couple of more checks and we walked into Guernica.

I saw the towers go down, so I thought that I would be prepared for the spectacle, but the enormity of the debris field dwarfed my expectations. It is about a quarter mile in any direction, there is no level area, the height varies from 15 feet thick to over 120 feet. Smoke still rises from all areas. Three of the tower facades still stand up to 10 floors but nothing is behind them, just the standing steel front. The field is lower in the center so it appears one has walked into the smoking ruins of Pompeii or another vast coliseum.

The exterior of the towers was made of 12-inch steel columns spaced four feet apart. As they fell these shafts speared everything in sight. A dozen of them protruded from the West Side Highway, sticking up like some mad confection. Four of them shot Zeus-style into the side of the American Express building 30 floors up, knocking off a corner. The debris washed across the highway smashing into the World Financial Center, blasting all of the glass from its walls.

Looking downward through the wracks of steel beams you realize they are sitting upon a sea of emergency vehicles.

How to Kill Firemen

1) Make an explosion.

2) Wait 15 minutes.

3) Make another explosion.

Spread out across the debris field are bucket brigades, serpentine chains of 200 people eachfiremen, cops, militarylines meandering up and down to the dig. The entire site is being excavated with five gallon pails which are hand passed to dump trucks. Not a finger will be lost. Each dig has a cadaver dog, the dog shows us where to dig and then a small hole is made. In goes a TV camera with a listening device and everybody yells to be quiet. Generators are turned off and everyone stands still.

After four days there is no more sound, so the digging and cutting begins. When they find a body they yell "body coming" and an adjacent brigade climbs across the wreckage to form an opposing line, the body is then passed on a stretcher between the lines. If it is a fireman (there are over 300) his hat is placed atop him and the stretcher is carried, not passed. Actually we "pass" the pall because there is no walking.

My first body was a fireman. His hat told me what had happened to him. Crushed, burned, shattered, it looked like a civil war relic brought up from the sea. My second body was a young girl, petite, in shape. I can't take this, I thought, and considered running. Thankfully we didn't have another for an hour or so.

Periodically the line would call "We need paint," meaning they found a body too deep to dig for at this time so the area is sprayed red to we can find it later. Several times we passed a body the size of a basket ball. If the wreckage shifts, a Klaxon blows twice telling everyone to run, which we do. A minute later they all run back, me still shaking. The next body was in a fetal positionshe must have lived a while, I thought, and died of exposure with a billion tons of mess on top of her, scared beyond understanding. All told, we found 27 bodies and carried 9 out.

You think there are no heroes in America? I saw a lanky blonde that could have modeled Chanel tie a rope around her ankle, grab a stethoscope and dive head first down a debris hole that would have shredded a raccoon. The firemen in general were fearless, shrugging their shoulders at the obvious danger of it all.

But missing from the scene was any mention of how it got like this, why it came down, what should be done about it. Nothing, not a peep. I suspect that it was a kind of collective shame for not having protected us from this.

After 12 hours the accumulated stress and fear get the best of me and I walked home. But I'm back in tomorrow.

JC
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              <text>Hey Chris,
darran and I both went thru our phone books, neither one of us has Tom's new # that we are sure of.  I was thinking about him alot.  no one is left of his family to even know to tell us if anything is wrong. He works in Harlem last I knew at a school and had moved uptown to be near Columbia U when he was a student, so he supposedly was out of the danger zone.  We are going to try to get ahold of him this weekend.  All circuits have been busy to NYC and a bunch of relay centers were on top of those buildings,etc..  I tried to not think about it,  I promise I will let you know as soon as I know anything.  He may not even be in the city anymore, he was talking about moving and I haven't talked to him in a long time, like maybe a year now?  I don't know, I am all freaked out and can't think about it.  Mike and Darran tell me he just has to be fine, he would have no reason to be anywhere near the trade center, b/c he is a teacher now.  I guess his last known neighborhood is not really near there.  
 
I am doing fine, Just a little stunned as is the rest of the world, I guess.  I teach 2 general bio recitations at SU on Tuesday, so on my third day in the classroom, this happened.  I got a crash course in the role of the teacher as counselor.  I was so not ready for something like this.  What the hell do you say to a bunch of 18 year olds, half of whom are from NYC or DC?  ESF at least had the respect to close campus by noon.  SU has been criticized for not closing classes out of respect for their students and for respect of what had just happened.  Business as usual for SU, the chancellor sent a message out around 11am to all staff saying just that, 'business as usual'  Okay, I had students in my 11:30 class who looked like they were about to vomit on their own shoes.  1/2 my class was missing because they were trying in sheer desperation to contact their families.  I have heard story after story about so and so's mom worked there and they haven't found her, etc..  One of my students is an RA in Lawrinson and I saw him on Wednesday and asked him how his floor was doing.  The stories of the loss and sense of not knowing were tragic.  One girl lost both of her brothers and both of her parents.  Bam, 3 weeks into freshman year, alone in the world.  I cried for her, whoever she is.  I have been sending emails to all of my students, and I haven't heard from all of them yet, I fear the worst for them.  they are my 'little geniuses' as I call them and I love them all...only three weeks into the semester.  I don't know, I was thrust into a role I hoped to have to never be in, especially about something this large scale.  I mean, I am aware of the role of teachers in these situations, but do you ever really want to have to fill those shoes?  I have the capacity to deal with it in regards to my students and they have been sending me e-mails thanking me for being the only one of their teachers who seems to care, and things along those lines.  So I suppose I am doing the right thing by ignoring SU's fucked up bullshit and letting students know that we need to be strong for each other and that we need to be the generation who makes the world a safe place for our own children to grow up in.  When I said that to my class I literally watched all of them bridge the gap between being children themselves to being adults.  literally watched them all change in an instant.  It wasn't a bad or scarey thing I told them, I didn't create the events that changed them forever, just gave a sobering reminder that they do have futures and this kind of crap can't be in it.  there has got to be a solution and we will be the ones to find it.
 
Well, it's late and I have to go to bed, so I can get up and do it all over again, i have bio lab tomarrow!  
 
all other things aside, I like teaching...my young Einsteins...they will be okay.  Maybe 15 or 20 years from now they will be winning noble peace prizes!!!
 
take care, and I will let you know about TP as soon as I know anything.
love
Cheryl
 
p.s. Mike was sampling a reservoir 30 mile N of manhattan and was clueless...sitting in a boat on the water supply to the place that was just attacked...la la la, what a nice day.  they got yanked off the water by NYCDEP and on his way home, he was like Holy shit, one trigger happy yahoo who had no idea that we have sampling permits and it could have been curtains.  good thing I had no idea how close he was or even had the chance to think about the water supply thing in light of terrorism.  whoa baby, i would have thrown up with stress.  And of course, noone could call his cell phone to tell him to get the fuck out of there...no signals b/c no tower relays  So on the up side, he hasn't seen all of the footage from that day and says he doesn't want to , so I am sure that won't last long with our media coverage.  We watched TV last night and he was watching tonight, but they aren't really showing that much of the planes hitting, etc. anymore. 
----- Original Message ----- 
From: Rick and Christine 
To: Cheryl 
Sent: Thursday, September 13, 2001 9:18 PM


Hi Cheryl.  How are you?  Hanging in here.  Have you talked to Tom Perlman?  I'm sure he is OK, but I have still been thinking about him living in NYC.  It is such a tragedy, one can't put words to it.  Please write and let me know about him.</text>
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              <text>A Few Thoughts That Grew

Morning of September 17, 2001

I went back to work today.  The Monday after.  A new week, a new New York, a new national proprioception, a new planet.  A new day.

The thoughts you are about to read are not unique.  Everyone similarly situated to me has had their analogs throughout the day, I am sure.

_____________________________________________________________________________

The drive to the ferry is perfectly normal.  A bright, beautiful day; no excess traffic; the electrical-fire smell that had wafted mid-week at least as far as we were in Syosset, 30-ish miles away from The Site, is no longer detectable.  Walking up to the ferry check-in counter, I immediately notice two things:  (i) the ferry is running late (as it is not yet docked five minutes prior to the scheduled departure time of 7:55, and some of the now-familiar on-boat crew are on land, in their jackets) and (ii) there are many more people waiting to board than is usual.  I suspect many have decided not to drive in or take the train today.  "No lines of cars stuck in traffic, no packed rail cars squeezing through tunnels into Manhattan Island (as all public transit must do), no overflowing throngs of people fighting their way in opposite directions across the subway platforms.  No.  Not today.  Instead, a boat humming, skimming across the open water of Long Island Sound, then kissing the edge of Manhattan Island so I can step gingerly, tentatively into The Mess, big toe first.  I'll do that.  A good day to try out this new ferry service."  That's what they must be thinking.  That's what I'd be thinking.

I check in.  No one asks me for ID.  They never did that before either, and they certainly recognize me after these past few months.  But would I rather they did check?  I study the faces waiting in the lobby -- who's ID would I check?  The boarding card hits my fingers.  As I am walking away, the check-in agent (or whatever they are called) tells me, pointing, that someone has donated lunches -- sandwiches and drinks.  What a kind gesture -- one of the many I've witnessed over the past week from New Yorkers who had always seemed so hard, so self-focused, so competitive.  I walk over to the labeled boxes.  "Turkey."  "Ham and Swiss."  "Water."  "Apples."   I remember that our Department Head told us, on one of our many conference calls during the displacement from our building last week, that our basement cafeteria would be unavailable today since it has been feeding the rescue workers, so we should bring our own food.  I forgot.  So I stuff a sandwich and water bottle into my briefcase.  Then I walk back to the check-in agent to ask who donated the lunches.  "Some of our Annual Riders."  That's a euphemism for the guys who pay-up for the Admiral Class seats on the upper deck of the ferry.  That entitles them to a free Journal, free parking, etc.  "Do you know who, specifically?"  "Oh, I don't know . . . Mr. So-And-So was one of them."  She said it like he was someone important, someone I would have heard of.  I look over at the labeled boxes again, and a woman has already eaten half of a ham and swiss sandwich.  Shana tova.  She seems fine.  OK.  A reasonable risk.  At least, I'll keep the food in my briefcase.  Maybe I won't need it.  Maybe the cafeteria will be open.  Maybe some of the neighborhood lunch places will have food.  We'll see.  Risk.  Suspicion.

I sit and wait for the boat to arrive.  I check voicemail, email.  More messages from the firm's and my division's leadership about luck, aid, heroism, progress, transportation, structural integrity, air quality, etc.  I leave messages for my teams about meetings scheduled for today that may or may not happen.  The boat arrives.

I walk down the dock, toward the boat.  Two uniformed police officers stand by, saying "good morning" and "how you doing" along the way.  That was new.  I smile a "thank you" as I make eye contact with both of them.  Here comes the first real change in myself I noticed, somewhat ashamedly:  As I enter the boat, there is a uniformed ferry porter escorting people over the gangplank.  One hand on the rail, one hand in his pocket, one foot on the side of the gangplank, the other with its heel down, toes pointing up.  He is relaxed, smiling, enjoying the sunny morning.  He is doing his job.  And he appears to be of Middle Eastern descent.  I recognize other uniformed ferry workers, but I haven't noticed this guy during my previous commutes.  I watch him for a moment as I walk by, to see if he makes eye contact.  He doesn't.  I wonder what kinds of screening procedures the ferry service has in place as part of its hiring protocol.  I look around at the other commuters.  Who will try to overpower him with me, if it comes to that?  Hints of law school conversations shoot through my head -- about racial profiling, type-casting, overt and subtle forms of prejudice.  I sit down and call my wife, lamenting about how my worldview is slowly changing.  I am suspicious.  I am wondering what level of fear is appropriate.

The boat ride is not unlike the dozens of others I have taken since we've been living on Long Island over the past 3 months.  When the safety video comes on, I decide to pay closer attention than usual to the instructions on "the donning of life vests."  But I forget to listen.  My thoughts go elsewhere.  I try to predict all the other ways I will look at the world differently from now on, all the events I will ponder that seemed insignificant just last week, but which now seem to rouse what-ifs, suspicion; which now seem to demand conjecture, judgment.  When the safety video ends, the TVs on the boat go back to broadcasting the morning's news.  No story is unconnected with The Attack.

Manhattan Island pinches at its southern tip, forming a small triangle about 1/2 of a mile wide at the latitude of the World Trade Center, which sits near the western edge of the triangle.  My office sits near the eastern edge, a bit closer to the southern tip, just over 1/4 mile away from 2 WTC, Tower 2, the South Tower.  My ferry docks at Pier 11, where Wall Street meets the East River.  The entire financial district is relatively small in area:  The Statue of Liberty, which is due south of the Island, is in plain view from both WTC and my office building.  As my ferry approaches Pier 11, I crane around to watch the Statue of Liberty come into view.  My eyes water up.  The image is powerful, given the backdrop of thoughts and emotions swirling in my head.

Many people don't realize, as I did not realize, that lower Manhattan's docks are bustling with commuters, not to mention tourists, in the mornings.  There is a continuous flow of ferries in and out of the numerous slips lining the southern tip.  When we dock, people waddle off my boat as usual, with their wide stances moving in the kind of slow motion you would expect from a line of people filing off of a swaying pier, then converging with similar lines coming from the other ferries docking at Pier 11.  I look up at the ironically-clear blue sky.  I notice a police boat patrolling the coastline.  And there are uniformed police everywhere.  And the smell is back -- toasted rubber and wires.  I have a pretty keen sense of olfaction.  I sniff the air deeply.  I feel a slight rasp in my throat, but write it off as my sinuses over-dramatizing for the benefit of my imagination.  As I move through the financial district walking toward my building, and the ambient air-flow changes direction, the smell diminishes -- even goes away completely at times.  

I wind my way through the maze I have been improving upon as my commute has progressed over recent weeks, turning many corners in approximation of the hypotenuse, through alcoves and corridors created by the very tall buildings.  I look at my watch, and subtract the 5 minutes that never fool me into being early.  9:20.  There is a line of people outside of 32 Old Slip, waiting for the building to open.  15% of them are wearing or holding masks.  Not just surgical masks, but also Brundle-fly, stereo-cylinder, metal-filtered, over-the-head, black floppy rubber gas masks.  I try to calculate the volume of biological or chemical irritants that would have to be amassed in one container to do any real damage upon release.  I reassure myself -- surely more than could be collected without raising suspicion.  There was that word again -- "suspicion".  I think about how forceful a rush of dust and soot would be created by a descending skyscraper, shooting debris down the narrow passages formed by these steel canyons.  Each street can become a powerful wind tunnel -- another thing most non-New Yorkers probably do not realize.  Dust and soot -- the biological-weapon-consequence of collapsing skyscrapers.  I wonder how clever, how vicious these terrorists are -- how much was intended, how much incidental.

I see two uniformed military men on a corner, dressed in fatigues.  I see their berets, combat boots, belt packs, flashlights, batons; I assume they are carrying guns.  I wonder, "why there, on that corner?"  As I walk past them, I look back at the sign of the store closest to them.  "Eastern News."  A news stand catering to nationals from a certain part of the world?  Likely.  I wonder why they positioned themselves so far from the news stand, if, in fact, that was why they were there -- out on the very far corner of the sidewalk, lots of people passing between them and their charge.  Maybe I am over-thinking it, proving too much.

A blur of people walking to work, not talking to each other.  Why not?  Are they too focused on studying their surroundings?  Wondering just how afraid they should be?  Formulating imaginary disasters in their minds?  Being suspicious?  How long will we feel this way?  Or is it just me?

My maze brings me to the back of my building, which is closer to the elevator bank servicing my floor than the front entrance.  I usually enter here, but not today.  I keep walking, around to the front of the building.  Broad Street winds in a northwesterly direction from the water.  A few buildings up is the NYSE; there Broad Street intersects with several corridors cutting due west to the WTC complex and surrounding buildings -- 1 Liberty Plaza, the Commodities Exchange, Bankers Trust Plaza, the American Stock Exchange, 7 WTC, the American Express building, the Merrill Lynch building, the Dow Jones building, and, of course, those humongous Twin Towers, each a full New York City block wide in both directions and 100-plus stories high.  If you have not stood beneath them, you cannot appreciate how truly massive they are, or were.  The special effects guy in my head cues up the footage of the first tower's collapse, footage I keep seeing again and again.  I shutter and keep walking, realizing that I somehow have advanced many steps without paying attention -- something you can only do when you are not trying to.  I see the NYSE come into view, along the curve of Broad Street.  Teary again as I try to focus on the huge American flag fluttering across the facade.  They are checking IDs of people going further, entering the Exchange.  I turn back toward my building, ready, maybe, to begin my work day.  I enter; I see the reception desks, the usual guards watching people scan their IDs across the turnstiles' laser-readers, the people sifting into their respective elevator banks.  I see a German shepherd lying on the ground, leashed to a burly security guard.  Security.  Dogs.  The world is different.

I get out on my floor.  Everyone in my group is in the large, central conference room; they are all looking in the same direction.  The TV.  I stop myself from wondering about what fresh hell has just been unleashed.  They are watching live coverage of the opening of the NYSE.  9:32.  The Exchange is opening late today.  I enter the silence.  Grasso is on the podium with "our heroes" -- some of those steel individuals who have not stopped digging, carrying, clearing, saving, encouraging, persevering, hoping, helping for a week straight.  They make me feel so proud -- of them, of us, of New York, of America.  Strange how I always scoffed at nationalism as small-minded, as just another "ism".  I suppose you live through a war, and you just feel differently about it.  Patriots.  Huh.  I listen to a woman in uniform sing "God Bless America" -- a song I always cited as one example of the hypocritical flouting of the alleged separation of church and state.  I try to make it sound different this time.  Listening, teary again, I wonder if I care that the people I work with may see my eyes well up.  The heroes ring the bell, the market opens, applause.  Those of us in the conference room greet each other for the first time, shake a frown around the room, disband.  No one has to say anything.  We are all thinking it to each other.

_________________________________________________________________________________

The day went forward.  I wrote this in between sporadic meetings and conference calls.  I have been in sort of a fog all morning.  All I want to do is kiss my wife and hug my children again and again.

I am so lucky.  I get to do that tonight.

I could go on about the rest of my day so far (1:05pm as of this writing) -- all of the unbelievable stories I have heard, all of the tales of grief, of fear, of fortune, of heroism.  The stories are truly incredible.  But there will be other things -- perhaps more important, hopefully more positive -- to write about soon. 
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              <text>I just wanted to check in with you guys.  I know you both have alot of friends and family up here, and wanted to make sure everyone was OK, or at least as well as could be expected .  

Things here in Queens are OK.  Until Tuesday morning, I was on a temp assignment at 1 Liberty Plaza, which is right across the street from the World Trade Center. I exited the subway into the concourse at about ten minutes before nine, and I saw people running, and heard the word "fire", but nobody really knew what was going on.  When came out the door of World Trade 4,  it almost looked like a victory parade going on, there was so much paper and drywall "confetti" flying through the air.  I went across the street to the park and watched in disbelief for a few minutes - my hair already full of debris - and then the second plane hit.  I was so close I could feel the heat from the explosion.  I was glued to the scene for several more minutes, and then I started working my way uptown.  I was gone by the time the buildings collapsed.

It took me a a few hours to walk up to the 59th street bridge and across to Queens (walking across the bridge with several thousand other people was quite an experience, too), but I made it home, as did my friends that I know - including Maury- who were working in the towers.  

It's all been pretty surreal.  We keep walking over to our window to look out and make sure it wasn't all a dream.  And we were so proud of our view . . . . . 

Again, I hope everyone you know up here is safe and well.   Take care - 

Harry</text>
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              <text>Hi Mike....
 
Tony Blair spoke briefly on American TV last night.  He was simply wonderful!  I almost wept.  He had dined at the White House with President Bush and both were enroute to a joint session of the US Congress where President Bush was to speak.  Mr. Blair went as a guest of the President and sat with Mrs. Bush.  I hope you will be able to read Mr. Blair's remarks in the British press.  He expressed unmitigated support for the US, and did it in a very sensitive, and gracious way.
 
President Bush's  speech was the best  ever, and extremely well received by all.  Isabelle and Cole can be proud to be British American, aka American British....whatever.....
 
I'm very sad.  This war is going to be costly.  I expect to start seeing body bags.  But we have no choice.  This must be done.  It is our only hope.
 
I'm not convinced that there won't be more terrorist attacks against the US within the next few weeks.  The US governement believes that it remains a possibility.
 
I'm saving People, Newsweek, and Time, magazines for Isabelle and Cole.  The photos of the attack are amazing.  It would be nice if you could hold on to British publications for them.  That way they could get a total international perspective on this historic, and sad  time.
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              <text>Your PM</text>
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              <text>Pardon my "form letter", but I wanted to get word out and let folks know that my family and I are okay. 

I don't know if most of you know this, but I work three blocks away from the World Trade Center. I was sitting at my desk when I felt and heard the first explosion. I remember thinking that it was too sunny out for it to have been thunder (we had a bad storm last night). A few minutes later, several people came over to my desk and said that 
a plane had crashed into the World Trade Center, and they tried to look out my window. All we could see out of the window was smoke and loads of papers flying all over. We went to our break room/pantry, and were standing around watching the news coverage of the first crash when the second plane hit. We felt the second explosion as we 
watched the second plane hit the other tower. That's when we realized this was no accident. 

We were told to leave the building. Once down in our office lobby, it looked like everyone else in the building had the same idea. Some moron from the building's Fire Safety staff was announcing that our building was not being evacuated, that it was secure, and that they were encouraging people to return to their floors. The manager who had instructed us to leave our office (who also happens to be one of 
my good friends on the job) said that was the dumbest announcement he ever heard. Three of us watched the smoke pouring out of the hole in one of the two buildings, and the full reality of it had yet to sink in. We stayed that way for a few more minutes, trying our cell phones in the hopes of calling family members to let them know we were okay, but cell phones were useless. So, I and one of our visitors from our Virginia office went down into the lower level of our building to find a pay phone, and to catch a subway train uptown. Fortunately, we were able to get a train fairly easily, and I had no problems catching a Queens-bound train at Times Square, so I was well on my 
way home and out of the area when the World Trade Center buildings collapsed.

My one sister lives in Manhattan, but far away from everything. My mother, and my younger sister, brother-in-law, niece and nephew all live in Queens near me. We're understandably shaken up and upset, but alive and well.

All of downtown Manhattan will be closed tomorrow to civilians, so that the rescue workers can work unhindered. I do not envy them.

@--&gt;--&gt;---

Carol/SinginRose
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              <text>09-12-2001 </text>
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              <text>memday2000@yahoogroups.com</text>
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              <text>SinginRose@aol.com</text>
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          <description>A brief summary of the topic of the message.</description>
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              <text>I'm shaken, but otherwise okay</text>
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              <text>Friends -
    Today was a watershed day in all of our lives.  No matter what our background, our work, our politics, religion, home country or state, this vicious act of barbarism has touched all of us in ways that we can not yet begin to imagine.  None of us can look at the world in quite the same way after this, never again.  We will continue to take plane trips, visit high-rise buildings and the like, but never again with the insouciance of the past.  
    Today, as I sat in a colleague's office watching the surreal events unfolding on TV, I glanced out the window, behind the TV, to Independence Hall less than half a block away, where workers were closing Chestnut Street and putting barriers around the building in the event that terrorists might strike there.  To our left, also less than half a block away, the same barricades were going up around the Liberty Bell pavilion.  For the first time, I thought about the parking garage that occupies the first four floors of our building, thought about how easy it would be to plant a car bomb, and felt real fear.  Sure, there was momentary fear after the first World Trade Center bombing, and again after domestic terrorists took out the Murrah Building in Oklahoma.  But this...  this was very very different.  
    This was not a small band of zealots making a single yet spectacular strike.  Those were awful but they were, at least to all appearances, stand-alone incidents, however terrible.  Not like today.  These sequential events -- one tower struck, then a second, then the Pentagon, then the second tower falls, then the first, then the plane in western Pennsylvania ... each with a brief period in between for the horror to hit, each event leaving all of us in that room with unspoken fears -- are we next?  if not us, then who?  is this how it starts?  how it ends? 
    A few years ago, when I prosecuted a despicable waste of oxygen named Robert Stephan Lipka for spying against the United States, selling our most precious secrets to the KGB during the late 1960s and early 1970s, I was invited to attend the Intelligence Community awards ceremony where John Whiteside, the FBI case agent with whom I was privileged to have worked, received a well-deserved award for his superb work on the case, the oldest espionage prosecution ever brought in this country.  The ceremony was in the auditorium at CIA headquarters at Langley.  Because the families of the recipients were invited, and few if any of them had the requisite security clearances to hear the still highly classified details of most of the actions for which awards were given (and even those of us with appropriate clearances had no "need to know"), the ceremony became rather comical in its lack of detail.  Group after group of serious-faced young men and women, some in military garb, others in civilian clothes, marched solemnly up to receive their awards while the audience was told that these courageous men and women, assigned in a place that could not be named, had risked life and limb to save unidentified treasures of this nation, or its allies, and to prevent the desctruction of numerous lives, by persons and/or groups that could not be disclosed.  It sounded very funny at the time, though all of us who worked national security cases knew that there was NOTHING funny about what these folks did - they were real heroes.
    I, a former anti-war activist who has never been a flag-waving rah-rah, underwent something of a philosophical transformation working with the FBI's FCI (foreign counterintelligence) agents.  Although I have prosecuted many criminal cases in more than two decades as a prosecutor, I have never been so proud or felt so privileged as I did in working with our "hidden heroes."  Outside the very insular intelligence community in which they work, they don't get glory, or even credit, for a job well done.  As I said at John Whiteside's retirement dinner (after other agents ragged him for dedicating his career to spies rather than bank robbers or Mafia dons), a drug trafficker -- even a highly successful one -- can only blight so many lives, but a single spy can bring down a nation.
    I thought a lot about those young men and women today, when all of the politicians and talking heads on TV were crowing about our failure of intelligence.  While it is true that this time, intelligence failed -- never mind that it is tougher than any of us can imagine to infiltrate underground groups like Hamas and other of its ilk -- it is so important to remember that we in the public are never told of the scores of successes that the FBI and other agencies in the intelligence community have had in preventing other acts of terrorism on our shores and elsewhere.  We don't know who these brave folks are, or what they do, or how they do it, or where, and we should not know.  But it must be remembered that it is the courageous work of these unsung and unseen heroes that has for so long allowed us to keep our innocence, allowed us to go about our lives, work in high-rise buildings and travel by air, without worrying that the sky was falling.  
    Some of that innocence, at least in part, was lost today.  
    I wish you all peace.
                                          Barb
    
    
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              <text>Sent: Tuesday, September 11, 2001 9:19 PM</text>
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              <text>nearly everyone I know</text>
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              <text>From: Barbara J. Cohan-Saavedra </text>
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              <text>----- Original Message ----- 
From: lloyd.bunting (e-mail address deleted)
To: anita.eglitis (e-mail address deleted)
Sent: Wednesday, 12 Sep 2001 12:33 am
Subject: Kamikaze attacks on NY and Washington!!! Three planes crashed into buildings! Wow!


World Trade Center in flames

 

11sep01

TWO planes have crashed into the twin towers of the World Trade Center in New York, according to witnesses.

Smoke is currently billowing out of both buildings.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Bush: Crashes acts of terrorism 
 

11sep01

NEW YORK: President George Bush today called the crashing of two planes into the World Trade Center in New York an "apparent terrorist attack on our country".

Bush said that he had been in contact with Vice President, the Governor of New York and the Director of the FBI. 

He said he had ordered a full investigation, adding that such an act of terrorism against the United States would not stand. 



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Pentagon in flames
 

11sep01

WASHINGTON: An aircraft has crashed into the Pentagon, according to witnesses. 
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              <text>Anita Eglitis</text>
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          <name>September 11 Email: From</name>
          <description>The email address, and optionally the name of the author.</description>
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          <name>September 11 Email: CC</name>
          <description>The email addresses of those who received the message addressed primarily to another.</description>
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              <text/>
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              <text>Re: Kamikaze attacks on NY and Washington!!!  Three planes crashed into buildings! Wow!</text>
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            <description>The media type of this item.</description>
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            <description>Whether the author created this item.</description>
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            <description>The IP address of the device used to submit the item.</description>
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              <text>I'm alright.  Lenore was in the World Trade Center PATH station when the
first plane hit.  She was able to escape to the street, and saw the second
plane hit.  She said there are bodies all over the place down there.  She
was able to walk to her office at South Street Seaport, but they're not
letting anyone in her building.  Please call Mom and let her know everyone
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              <text>Eric R Huff</text>
            </elementText>
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        </element>
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            <description>The media type of this item.</description>
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